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Adult Kids Say the Darndest Things (On Twitter)

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A treasury of tweets that every parent of an adult kid will love!



On Being Replaced

Hey mom, since you're missing me and all why don't you buy a deaf, three-legged bunny. Oh you did? Good. #emptynest

I feel actually sibling rivalry re: my parents' spoiled empty nest-era pets. The cat my parents got when I moved out is a JERK and I HATE HIM.

My mom is singing happy birthday to my dog and talking about getting him a birthday hat for tomorrow... Definitely empty nest syndrome


Are We a Wee Bit Jealous?

Mom says f*** it I've got a kid in college now, might as well buy a BMW since I don't have to support him anymore

All my parents do is vacation. Don't they know they have a kid in college.

Of course the rents buy a dope tv as soon as the kids move out! #WhereWasThatInHighschool




On Adulthood

When do I know Im a real adult?When I get 1 of those mortgage thingys ppl are always talkin about? or when I stop eating frosting for dinner

Going home so my parents will have a designated driver. They've obviously flourished with an empty nest




Oh No Mom! You Didn't!

Tell my mom I'm getting a dog because ill be supper lonely in college and she tells me to get a boyfriend.

Things my mom says: "I've been doing a lot of thinking about you hiatal hernia" Really? She's got too much time on her hands. #emptynest

#newstrategy every time my mom sends me a job opening at her hospital I'm going to send her an article on dealing with an empty nest


Sometimes It's All in a Name/Twitter Handle

I guess I'm a boomerang kid, cause I came back home after college...I always leave and come back. I'm a boomerang kid. Born in the 90's I was meant to be indecisive. ;)

Your turn: Got a favorite?