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Cubs Pursuing Bush Shoe-Thrower; 'Do You Think He's A Lefty?' Asks Curious Hendry

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The Cubs today announced their desire to sign the angry Iraqi journalist who heaved a pair of shoes at President Bush during a press conference yesterday, saying he could be a key bullpen addition.

"Everyone who watched our last two playoff meltdowns knows our pitchers couldn't deliver under pressure," said Hendry. "We could certainly use that guy in our bullpen. Do you think he's a lefty?" For more visit TheHeckler.com.