It took me years to leave my girls with a babysitter. But now there are days when I really just need the down time; a couple hours to be surrounded by quiet and hear my own thoughts, remember a grocery list or finish a sentence without interruption. On the rare occasions I need a sitter, it sometimes seems like I'd do just about anything to get those few precious moments of freedom. Even lie.
After all, I want to make sure the sitter won't be scared off by what really happens in my house. You know what I mean, right?
Here are a few white lies to try to ensure you can get a sitter who will care for your kids.
1. "The baby will go right down for a nap, no problem," knowing damn well that the child hates naps and will fight naps to the death.
Upon returning home from the same time away, when the babysitter tells you that junior wouldn't nap and she tried everything. You feign surprise and pretend that it's the first time that this has happened, ever!
2. "The children have been fed and will require no snacks before bed time," knowing that every night at bed time, your children escape the bed no less than seven times in the name of crackers, apples and water.
3. "We don't let the kids watch television." Poor little Suzie Sunshine exhausting herself watching your precious children, trying everything to entertain them with books, songs and games. Running herself ragged living up to your expectations. In actuality, you already let the kids watch three hours non-stop of Sprout today and only told her this fib to alleviate your own Mommy guilt.
4. "Bobby's allergic to processed food and has a weird skin reaction that lasts for days." This white lie ensures that the babysitter will feed your child a wholesome meal rather than hot dogs and Cheetos.
5. "We have security cameras throughout the house. If you get in trouble, just give us the thumbs down sign and we will come right home." This will keep the sitter from getting into any shenanigans while you are out, as well as keep any rogue boyfriends from showing up.
6. "We'll try to be back before the kids go to bed," knowing that you want to be somewhere, anywhere else, tonight because it's Thursday night and the kids are overtired and there's always bedtime drama on Thursday night. You pull up but sit outside until the last bedroom light goes off.
Have you ever told your child's babysitter a white lie just to keep them on their toes?
*No children or babysitters were actually lied to in the writing of this post.
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