Children's stories for Huffpo Kids!

Every one loves a cute story about kids and the love they share with those around them. But nobody's cuter than a child-friendly HuffPo, helping kids see the world around them through HuffPo eyes! Take a look at these kids stories, adapted just for you!

CUTE ANSWER TO YOUR PRAYERS!
One day during class, a teacher asked if any students say their prayers before eating. "No we don't," said a young boy. "My mom is a good cook!" The teacher laughed, and then informed him when his mother dies, that would be the last he ever sees of her.

BABY TALK!
A Teacher was talking to her first graders about families. One little boy says he had different color hair than his brothers. One girl says he was adopted. He says, "What does it mean?" "It means," said the girl, "that you grew in your mommy's heart instead of her tummy!" "That's true," says the teacher, "But your natural birth mother did not have to bring you to term. She could have aborted you. And you should have supported her decision."

SCHOOLBOY CRUSH!
After school, a girl tells her parents that a boy had kissed her at recess. "How did this happen?" asked her mom. "It wasn't easy," said the girl, "but a bunch of girls helped me catch him!" Mom laughed and handed her daughter some condoms. "You go girl! Take these in case he may want anal."

BRIDE AND SWOON!
During a wedding, a little girl whispers to her mother, "Why is the bride dressed in white?" "Because white is the color of happiness," her mother explains. The child thought about this, then said, "why's the groom wearing black? Mom laughed. Years later the young girl became a prominent lesbian activist. The bride, however, turned to self-mutilation after giving up a promising career in medicine to have children.

BARKING UP THE WRONG TREE!
A police car pulls up in front of a school. The officer gets out, leaving his barking dog in the back seat. "Is that a dog back there?" asks a boy. "Yes it is," says the cop. The boy pauses and then says, "What'd he do?" The cop laughed. Then he took out his billy club beat the child on the head because he was black, and the cop was racist.

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COMMENTS

I can't believe they allow you write this crap on the blog. Also, Clearly you didn't do enough research in advance. I am just waiting for more Hooman Majd.

Posted by mike at July 20, 2005 2:02 PM

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Note to mike....I think you hit the point of Greg's note. i agree. I would also like to see more Hooman Majd on the blog.

Posted by will at July 20, 2005 2:05 PM

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The point that Greg doesn't get is that no one finds him funny. Except maybe those rightwingers over at NRO. I for one, would like more posts on Karl Rove. I think it's a conspiracy worth looking into. Why hasn't Arianna jumped on this?

Posted by O. Stone at July 20, 2005 2:11 PM

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Greg is getting what he deserves....and he's really not that funny. He's about as funny as the current US occupation in Iraq. Maybe that's an irony that even Greg would appreciate. I would also like to see more Hooman Majd.

Posted by eric at July 20, 2005 2:13 PM

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this kind of humor is in part the result of Bush's War on Iraq.

posted by jann wenner at July 20, 2005 2:14 pm

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i even have come up with some funny topic headings for Hooman Majd, like "oh the hoomanity!" and "more Hooman than Hooman."

Posted by N. Mailer, at July 20 2005 2:24 pm

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I totally agree with N. Mailer. I agree with Arianna as well. And who ever posts below me, i agree too.

Posted by R. Blow. at July 20 2005, 2:25 pm

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I am in Capri and just got back from Sardinia. They don't have hybrid cars there, so i had to take an SUV to the airport. I was so angry I did not tip the driver.

Posted by Arianna at July 20, 2:30 pm

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For what it's worth, I would also like to see more Jim Lampley.

Posted by Jim Lampley, at July 20 2005, 2:25

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I suppose this is some kind of snotty Young Republican "humor." I don't buy it. And i'm willing to put money on it that Irshad Manj doesn't buy it either.

Posted by Jim, at July 19, 2005, 2:28 pm

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You're right Jim, i don't find it funny. Also, is it true they are giving away free pens for commenting?

Posted by Irshad, at July 19, 2005., 2:29 pm

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It's this kind of garbage that's responsible for that man in Tampa beating his kid to death. I am a peace activist, and this kind of stuff makes be sick to my stomach. I am also single and available.

Posted by G. Stone, at July 19 2005 2:30 pm

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I only joined this blog because of Gwyneth. Can someone could send her a note from me?

Posted by D. Corn, at July 20, 2005 2:31 pm

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I am also wondering why don't you have more Jim Lampley on the blog.

posted by jim lampley, at July 20, 2005, 2:32 pm

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Am i the only one posting now? I hate being the last person to post.

posted by Jim Lampley at July 20, 2005, 2:34 pm

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All this is a non local single correlation of the One consciousness at the heart of creation.

Ecstatically yours --- and buy my book

posted by Deepak. at July 20, 2005. 2:35 pm

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Whew- thanks Deepak! Oh crap.

Posted by Jim Lampley, at July 20, 2005, 2:36pm