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Theresa Payton

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Why My Husband Left Facebook

Posted: 06/04/2012 7:18 pm

Did you survive the NASDAQ ups and downs when Facebook had its big debut? Are you still wondering how your Facebook data and the fact that your former college roommate plays Farmville on Facebook are worth $104 Billion? Now that the hoopla is over and there is a Mrs. Zuckerburg in the picture, it is time to focus on what really matters -- your privacy or what is left of it. I found it Freudian indeed when Facebook's Chief Privacy Officer, Erin Egan, said they were not making a lot of substantive changes to the Facebook privacy policy but that they wanted to "err on the side of providing too much information." Read that phrase again because that is what Facebook has actively been doing for years -- erring on the side of providing too much information. Expect this to ramp up to keep their market valuation in the plus column.

When Facebook announced their new privacy policy was open for comments after meeting with Ireland's Data Protection Commissioner (DPC), I was determined to read the policy for my clients. The policy was open for comments until May 18, 2012 so the marked up policy is not final but it provides hints as to where Facebook is headed.

So after I gave my husband a recap of the current state of privacy as I knew it, he softly says, "That's it. I'm done. I'm deleting my Facebook account now!" His reasons for getting off Facebook are: 1. He doesn't want to be "for sale"; 2. He would rather connect in person; and 3. He doesn't really need to know the daily eating habits of 300 "friends"; It took a few clicks but he finally found out how to delete his Facebook account without any withdrawal symptoms. He thinks he's already saved an hour a day. If he needed it, Facebook gives him a time period to reactivate it just in case he changes his mind, but I think he's enjoying less "screen time" in his day. After going cold turkey he is surprised how many people told him they were considering deleting their accounts too. Maybe more people will start writing cards instead? Who knew that the Facebook IPO might drive revenue to the beleaguered USPS?

If you do not have time to read more of this blog post, I'll give you the bottom line about Facebook's privacy policy in tweet form:

Facebook's new privacy policy spells out your lack of privacy.

If you want to know what the next generation of Facebookers think about using Facebook and their privacy, here is a sneak peak. I teach internet safety classes for children K-12 and when I asked my middle school kids if they were going to spend a lot of time on Facebook this summer some of my students chimed in and said Facebook was "dumb" and a "big time waster." Another student said they hated seeing photos posted of them online without their permission. One group of middle schoolers actually did a skit where they showed how their real social life died when they invested too much in their online social life via Facebook and other activities.

So, if you do not have time to read screens of information on the privacy policy for Facebook, I've pulled out the top 5 that struck me:

1. They are going to share your data to send you ads OUTSIDE of Facebook.
2. Facebook does not commit to a timeframe for data deletions, if ever.
"We store data for as long as it is necessary to provide products and services to you and others..."
3. Anything you post really belongs to Facebook, and not you, including your photos.
4. If a friend wants to download your information, your post, or your picture or just about any other piece of data you put on Facebook to their cell phone, they can. Convenient or Creepy?
5. They admit they gather lots of information about you when you post, including the IP address, internet service, browser you use, and GPS location you are posting from and if you are on a mobile device or a computer.

The privacy policy is going to continue to morph and change and it is not scenario based so you may find it hard to relate the words back to your own personal profile. Flipping back to a report from the Irish DPC, their spokesperson was quoted as saying, "...there are a number of matters identified in our audit report..including retention periods and facial recognition specifically...that remain the subject of ongoing discussion with Facebook." If you want a story to relate to, read a frightening and true story about facial recognition and twisted identity theft that happened to a young college student named Whitney in my new book "Protecting Your Internet Identity: Are You Naked Online?"

So how will Facebook appease the stock market now that it is public? They have to monetize their most valuable asset, their users. Fifty six percent of Americans said they have a Facebook account and out of that population, 3 in 10 users in a recent AP-CNBC poll said they use Facebook every day. Most of those users are the younger demographic. Fifty nine percent of Facebook users polled in an AP-CNBC poll said they do not trust Facebook to take care of their personal and private details. The very data that you share with friends and family on Facebook must be packaged and sold to firms. The only product Facebook has for sale is you. Not the physical you but the digital you: your information, your network of friends, your "like" button choices, how and when you use Facebook, the games you play, and more. Remember the Police song, "Every breath you take, I'll be watching you" released in 1983? How prophetic that Facebook feels the same way about you, "Every breath you take, And every move you make, Every bond you break... Every word you say... Every game you play... Oh can't you see? You belong to me..." You can almost imagine this being piped in as a theme song during a Facebook campus hackathon.

That's the bottom line: You are for sale. I did not see that spelled out in the privacy policy, did you? Now that they are a publicly traded company, there will be more transparency such as SEC filings and reviews, which can be a positive. Facebook typically listens to its users and has made concessions and compromises over the years. It is too early to know if he will he be able to hear the opinions of Facebook users over a Board and investors asking for their return on investment.

Facebook boasts roughly 800 million active users on Facebook. My husband requested to permanently delete his account so now they have one less. $104 Billion in value is the financial market's expectation. Hard to fathom making that much money off of selling data for 3 in 10 active users that are mostly the younger demographic.

So, with the new direction of Facebook and the new privacy policy about to come out, where do you stand? Will you use Facebook less or more? Will you delete your account? Do you agree with my middle school kids? I would love to hear from you.

Theresa Payton is the co-author of the new book, "Protecting Your Internet Identity: Are You Naked Online?"

 
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Did you survive the NASDAQ ups and downs when Facebook had its big debut? Are you still wondering how your Facebook data and the fact that your former college roommate plays Farmville on Facebook are ...
Did you survive the NASDAQ ups and downs when Facebook had its big debut? Are you still wondering how your Facebook data and the fact that your former college roommate plays Farmville on Facebook are ...
 
 
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04:37 PM on 06/06/2012
There are lots of people leaving Facebook. We have a Blackout organized for next week and you're invited.
04:29 PM on 06/06/2012
Users are working to make a Facebook Blackout:
http://www.facebook.com/events/428565493831258/
04:14 PM on 06/06/2012
Lots of people are planning a Facebook Blackout for next week:

http://www.facebook.com/events/428565493831258/
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Progressive2
02:18 PM on 06/06/2012
I will take a look at Google Plus to see what it does. Facebook is becoming a burden for time anyway.
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09:54 AM on 06/07/2012
Google isn't any better when it comes to privacy. Practically any large "social network" that offers a free account will be looking to make profit on advertising. In order to entice advertisers to pay to be on the service, the service will have to harvest data on you.
12:11 PM on 06/06/2012
Anything you post really belongs to Facebook, and not you, including your photos.
----------------------------------------
Use of ''really'', makes me want to ask. Really? Does it or does it not?
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10:01 AM on 06/07/2012
People get tripped up in the legalese of the "terms of service" for most sites like Facebook. The same went around about Myspace, mp3.com and a host of others at times. Essentially, by signing up to use their service, you give them a limited right to reproduce the content you've uploaded to them, which is so they don't have to be worried about getting sued for displaying such content later. However, it does not give them the right to sell a movie or photograph you've uploaded.

https://www.facebook.com/legal/terms

"Sharing Your Content and Information

You own all of the content and information you post on Facebook, and you can control how it is shared through your privacy and application settings. In addition:

For content that is covered by intellectual property rights, like photos and videos (IP content), you specifically give us the following permission, subject to your privacy and application settings: you grant us a non-exclusive, transferable, sub-licensable, royalty-free, worldwide license to use any IP content that you post on or in connection with Facebook (IP License). This IP License ends when you delete your IP content or your account unless your content has been shared with others, and they have not deleted it."
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nettwench
Dedicated Truther!
12:02 PM on 06/11/2012
Good to know. I did a double-take when I first saw that, too! They "own" pictures I upload, even for a business? I certainly hope not!
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BurningStarz
Matrix Is A System Neo.
12:46 AM on 06/06/2012
It's time for people to get on google plus as I did, much more convenient, the privacy is way better you have a TOTAL control on who can see what, who you share with...People who care about a minimum of privacy should chose G+ and do I have to mention you have better service as the hangout? possibility to video chat up to 10 at the same time? Share and work on all your docs etc?
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Tony Santos
lost on earth...Holes in the Foam...
11:11 PM on 06/05/2012
I find it funny how people flatter themselves regarding FB. You don't have to post ANYTHING on FB that you don't want to. Don't want FB to be able to sell your info? Don't give them any. Or how about this? Just lie. Whatever the case, the idea that anyone has any real privacy these days are just delusional. Every little thing we do provides data for other entities to mine. But just stop with the paranoid whining already. People use FB because it does end up serving some purpose for them. For me, it's a time-SAVING tool. I can communicate with so many people in a second. I travel quite a bit, and FB gives me the ability to stay connected with all my friends around the globe. Nothing even comes close. Can FB be a huge time-waster and life-sucker? Absolutely. I know a lot of people who would be far better off with no FB account. But that accounts for a vast minority of my 640+ friends.

Again, you don't have to post anything on FB that you don't want known about you. Like any other tool on the planet, FB can either be used wisely, or stupidly. But don't get sanctimonious about the concept of privacy, and most especially, don't whine about it. Privacy and security are mere illusions at this stage. Get used to that.
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Progressive2
02:21 PM on 06/06/2012
I think you are making a good evaluation- especially about privacy concerns. Still, I feel Facebook has become something of a time burden. Also eliminating the group discussion topics has added a burden of repeat information and threads that are unnecessary.
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Progressive2
02:24 PM on 06/06/2012
When I entered data for favorite musicans, sports etc, I did not expect to get flooded with promotions for those entries. I deleted them and it has reduced the burden. Still, I am getting more that I want to see posted.
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SweetClarissa
My micro-bio got dosed with nano-antibiotics
07:48 PM on 06/05/2012
I think a great many people will, some numbers of years from now, really, really, REALLY, regret having provided all sorts of information to Facebook. This will happen because eventually, in one way or another, that same information that appeared to be of use FOR oneself will prove to also be of great use to others AGAINST said.....Ya don't believe me?....Just watch, you'll see.....................-;)
06:42 PM on 06/05/2012
I really think there will be a rise in socially conscious social media services. Privacy is too important. And once folks start becoming educated about it, more and more will demand control over their content. I just started consulting for a social media company that doesn't track ANYthing you do through its site. The business model does not involve scraping your data. It's still in beta, but I'm so certain this is the future! It's giving me hope that we can still enjoy our virtual lives without giving up our privacy for the sake of the company's bottom line. Check it out. https://sgrouples.com/
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nettwench
Dedicated Truther!
12:21 PM on 06/11/2012
Great idea! What gave me the creeps was number 5 on the list:

5. They admit they gather lots of information about you when you post, including the IP address, internet service, browser you use, and GPS location you are posting from and if you are on a mobile device or a computer.

Advertisers need to know my IP address and GPS location? Really??? That's ridiculous!
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Leond
Fine and dandy, Jack!
04:59 PM on 06/05/2012
I love this line: "Remember the Police song, "Every breath you take, I'll be watching you" released in 1983?".

I hope your husband does something interesting again very soon.
12:05 PM on 06/05/2012
These folks are getting closer to being the "facehuggers" of alien fame, than providing any value for the over 20 crowd.

One of my big concerns has always been the CIA penchant for using sites like this after the fact for information gathering, now brought to you with no required warrant.
12:01 PM on 06/05/2012
I left FB in April after a popup window appeared the very second that I posted a comment referring to a Huff post article critical to the Rep. party. It cautioned me that my comments were inappropriate. I did not use bad language nor violate any terms of service. All I said was that I agreed with the point of the article. Clearly, FB monitors every post and now tries to stifle anti conservative posts. Other friends of mine reported similar messages from their postings. I realized that I no longer could post freely when everything I wrote was being instantly scrutinized by FB so I left FB and never looked back. It is hard to lose the contact of friends but I do not regret my decision.
02:09 PM on 06/06/2012
1984 2012
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nettwench
Dedicated Truther!
12:36 PM on 06/11/2012
That is pretty unbelievable. I have heard many stories about posts on particular people's Facebook pages, like Sarah Palin's, for example, being deleted if they are critical, but this is the first I've heard of the pre-emptive strike! These people have a goal of stifling free speech, and blocking all dissenting opinion. That's not communication, that's censorship! I posted my reply to your above post to the next post by Midnight Sun, by mistake! See below, re Wikipedia being whitewashed by conservatives!

How right-wingers took over Wikipedia

By Marc McDonald

http://the-reaction.blogspot.com/search/label/Glenn%20Beck
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11:53 AM on 06/05/2012
I'll keep using it so long as my extended family and old school friends do. That's the only reason I'm on there. I regret accepting friend requests from people I see more frequently, as they just add noise to the page and, well, I see them in person frequently.

If one is truly concerned about keeping their identity "private" from Facebook, there are ways to do that. First, don't use your real name, or any other real identifying information, when signing up. They can't create a worthwhile profile on a non-identity. Second, connect only via Tor, or some other proxy service. Then they will have no way of identifying you through your location or IP address. Third, if ads annoy you, install the Adblock Plus plugin to your browser. No Facebook ads will come up when that is active.

Use the above method and, while Facebook will still be able to harvest some data from your use, it will essentially be worthless as they can't attach it to a real person.
01:42 PM on 06/05/2012
The fake identity idea kind of defeats your reason for using FB. Who wants to add "John Doe" when they don't know them? Most people on the net, let alone FB, don't know what a proxy is. People may scream about privacy concerns but they just will not give up the ease of use. People are lazy.
01:58 PM on 06/05/2012
Facebook i tracking me and I have never had an account - I find that horribly creepy.
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10:12 AM on 06/07/2012
Turn off 3rd party cookies.
11:45 AM on 06/05/2012
I really enjoy seeing people who I've lost touch with over the years. All the friends from high school are now having children and starting families and some of them are having some personal issues and it's great to be in the know about it. I interact with some close friends through it and get to see my best friend's kids' dance recitals when I'm too busy to hang out for a month or so. I also saw a status update that was suicidal in nature from an old acquaintance who I knew had social issues and I contacted the authorities and called his mom and he got the help he needed. His cry for help was heard. I'm upset about the privacy issues, but being able to stay in touch with people I care about and helping others (I often help with technology decisions for some of my friends) makes it worthwhile for me. However, if everyone was on Google+, I'd probably be there more, but no one is on Google+.
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11:19 AM on 06/05/2012
Just remember: with Facebook YOU are the product, corporations are the buyers.