More

Featuring fresh takes and real-time analysis from HuffPost's signature lineup of contributors
Therese Borchard

GET UPDATES FROM Therese Borchard
 

Video: On Death And Dying

Posted: 03/02/09 09:43 AM ET

Have you ever witnessed a sudden death? It brings everything into perspective.... regarding the small stuff of life, and how everything is really small stuff. I've been a midwife to a graceful death, when my dad died 14 years ago. I held his hand as it became cold and was taken aback by the beauty of that moment. But there was nothing elegant or lovely about Dan's death. I'm still not sure what to make of it.

***

Originally published on Beyond Blue at Beliefnet.com. To read more of Therese, visit her blog, Beyond Blue, on Beliefnet.com, or subscribe here. You may also find her at www.thereseborchard.com.


 

Follow Therese Borchard on Twitter: www.twitter.com/thereseborchard

Have you ever witnessed a sudden death? It brings everything into perspective.... regarding the small stuff of life, and how everything is really small stuff. I've been a midwife to a graceful death, ...
Have you ever witnessed a sudden death? It brings everything into perspective.... regarding the small stuff of life, and how everything is really small stuff. I've been a midwife to a graceful death, ...
 
 
  • Comments
  • 12
  • Pending Comments
  • 0
  • View FAQ
Comments are closed for this entry
View All
Bloggers
Recency  | 
Popularity
01:18 AM on 03/05/2009
I clinically died three times two days after a surgery that I was given a 10% chance to survive. I went over after I flatlined and I can tell you that it is a beautiful experience, painless, seeing without eyes, hearing without hearing, feeling your spirit weightless floating towards the golden river of eternity..........I talk about in on www.onlymomentsbook.com under the "Backstory" section. I had written of "going over" in that book 14 years earlier and the similarities were uncanny. I chose to fight to come back and was 'allowed" for some reason..........seconds later the medical team was bolting in with the defibrillation device and stopped dead in their tracks as I stood by my bed with my hands out to stop them........they were ready to begin emergency procedures and just stood there stunned. I asked for the printed readouts and they brought them to me.......flatlined for over 14 seconds.
04:49 AM on 03/05/2009
pt. 1
While most near death experiences involved people in hospital, I actually willed my death once. See if my experience fit into yours.
When I graduated from college and took my first job, I had to take public transport to work leaving in the wee hours of the morning and coming back at night. On the way back I could see homeless people many were old, sick, hungry and feeling cold.
Every night coming back home I feel sad and disturbed by these scenes.
Then one night I came home so sad I asked why? Why are people suffering like that? Why? I was very emotional and began to cry deep inside my heart I could literally feel warm tears in my heart. I made a vow to take care of my mother and never let her suffer like that. I don’t mind dying to find out why people are suffering. That night something strange happened.
As I laid on the bed I became distinctively aware of my every breath coming in and out. It came to a point that my breath was slow until it was almost one with the consciousness to breathe and the heart beat. It became very slow. There was hesitation but because of what I said to myself about dying so I decide to let go. The breathe stop and the heart beat also stopped. There was a moment of
04:51 AM on 03/05/2009
pt.2
complete darkness as if someone switched off the light. Then there was a light above and I felt very light as if all these years I had been carrying a bag of cement on my shoulder had just threw it away. When I entered the light I was happily welcomed by many beings without form and we were telepathic. We bath in a golden light and there were very beautiful sceneries. Then I saw a bright light coming to me and I said I am no ready yet. The light acknowledge by replying, “ Yes you are not ready yet.”
From there the sequence was a reverse action as I moved from the bright towards darkness enter my body and I could feel my first heart beat and taking the first breath.

I opened my eyes it was 5'oclock in the morning. The reason 'I was not ready yet' was because I made a vow to take care of my mother.
I never treasured this experience even until now, but the strange thing is for the first two weeks there was completely no fear of death at all. I could just walk into the middle of the road and not fearful of being killed. After all these years I still do not fear death.
photo
brooklyncitizen
Quaerite primum regnum dei
12:42 AM on 03/04/2009
Sudden death is traumatic.

Within minutes of discovering my father was in a hospital on life support in a foreign country he died. An hour later I was on a plane to bury him.

Beyond the loss of a loved one, deaths are also red flags that go up announcing that this too is our fate....it is so quick this life.

I don't think death is negative it is just a fact that we the living seem to never quite feel at ease with. As long as we are living our capacity and loving more than is our capacity....it's all good I think.
photo
HUFFPOST BLOGGER
Anne Naylor
Celebrant, Weddings and Other Blessings
11:58 PM on 03/03/2009
Dear Therese

Thank you for your courage in sharing this video. I feel for your grief.

God bless you abundantly in every way.

Anne
02:32 PM on 03/03/2009
This particular post by Therese Borchard resonated with me in light of what is happening in our dear friend Jean's life and that of her twin sister Janet. I'm hoping this helps in some small way to articulate how precious life is and that it truly never ends. Amor y Paz.
12:30 PM on 03/03/2009
Therese, I am so sorry for your loss and for the loss of those who loved your friend Dan. I have experienced sudden death (my first husband at my side) and long lingering death (my brother, of leukemia). It is clear that sudden death is most tolerable for the dying and lingering death is most tolerable for the living. But there is no solace in that observation.
I know this: time does not heal, but it does allow our human brains to slowly accept a new reality, a world in which that person no longer shares our physical space. I think you are making the very best of an inconceivably tragic event: you are learning and you are sharing. One cannot now imagine how the lives of those who witnessed Dan's death will be affected by his last words, to the very ends of their own lives--but be assured they will be. Truly a blessing, shrouded in terror.
You are a good friend to so willingly share your thoughts. Keep up the good work.
08:37 PM on 03/02/2009
My friend's grandmother was a Christian and had lung cancer, she smoked during her younger days and was already 80 years old. A large part of her lungs were already gone. She had to breathe oxygen to stay alive. Her children couldn't bear to see her suffer like this when death would be a better choice for her. She has been in a semi conscious state like this for 2 weeks. They told me to visit her and when I arrived I asked the family if she is still pining for a missing family menber yet to come back to see her. They told me all of them including her grand children are already back. I went to her bed, kneld beside her and told her my name. She was on oxygen mask but nodded her head to confirm she recognize me. I held her cold and fragile hand and said to her gently. " This body cannot sustain life anymore. You have to let go of it. Do not fear when you let go, there will be a moment of darkness and then there wil be a bright light. Follow the light. " She nodded again to confirm she heard me. After saying good bye to her I went home, two hours later her family called to tell me she had passed away peacefully.
02:56 PM on 03/02/2009
I am a firm believer in reincarnation. I believe we have all lived millions of times and will continue to do so. I think Jesus and other enlightened people have tried to explain this to us. I believe that when a person hurts another person, they are really hurting themselves and will experience the exact same hurt, either in this life or the next. There is no free lunch for hurtful behavior. An American genius, Walter Russell, explained both spiritually and scientifically, that our souls are immortal, along with a blueprint for having a successful life.
photo
HUFFPOST BLOGGER
Alex Geana
12:26 PM on 03/02/2009
Sudden death is so difficult to deal with because it questions your own mortality and view of the world. You really do understand how precious life is and how quickly it is lost. To see it like that, must have filled the room with fright. I dealt with two sudden deaths by writing, writing, writing. One day my friend was with me, the next, they had passed. Both were elderly, yet not aged. Both meant a lot to me.

Thanks for the video, it made me once again see how important they were in my life.
10:34 AM on 03/02/2009
Sudden death leaves a great void in one's life. Thirty years ago my father died of a heart attack within 30 minutes, and I was far away. On a less personal level, years ago a young man I did not know but who worked where I did hit a patch of ice as he was driving to work early one morning, skidded violently, and was killed. That has remained in my mind.
photo
HUFFPOST BLOGGER
Jesse Kornbluth
10:14 AM on 03/02/2009
Sometimes a picture really is worth a thousand words.

More rarely are videos worth a thousand.

What Therese does here is so deeply personal, so completely exceptional, that her video is worth the effort it took --- and, now, the time it takes for us to react.