Every now and again, when I'm at a show with Vivian, people come up to me and comment on how I'm always there for Vivian or how I'm always carrying her stuff. Some have even gone as far as saying I'm a saint. To be honest, I don't understand it. For me, supporting Vivian just makes sense. Now, I'm not saying I'm perfect at it, or that there aren't times when I wish she never existed. However, at the end of any performance or appearance, all that matters to me is whether or not Vivian had fun.
This is something that she loves to do, and I love her, so why wouldn't I support her? The way I look at it, I was there before Vivian, and I'm going to be there after Vivian. So why not try to make Vivian as good as she can be and as big as as she can get?
Do I think Vivian is going to change the world, or even just the world of drag? Not even in my wildest dreams. I look at it this way, though: If Vivian can bring a smile to one person in the audience or raise money or awareness for causes that are important to us, it's more than worth it.
I'm a firm believer that it's everyone's responsibility to give back to his or her community, and Vivian and I try to do that as much as possible. We don't always succeed, due to outside circumstances or bad decisions on our part. In the end, though, we attempt to give back more than we receive. This is some thing I extremely proud of it. Why wouldn't I want to share that with the person who means everything to me?
The general public may see all I do for Vivian, but trust me: That support does not come cheap for Vivian. If you haven't been able to guess via my diary entries, there are times that I can be negative. The one thing that gets me through those negative times is Vivian.
For me, support is a two-way street in any relationship, and in our relationship that street is a 70-m.p.h. freeway. We constantly support one another. It's what makes us such a great team. So please, when you see me out supporting Vivian, realize she does just as much for me, if not more; you just don't see it.
This blog post originally appeared on Diary of a Drag Queen's Husband.