Democratic Losers: What They Should Have Said And What They Actually Said, 1952-2008

1952: ADLAI STEVENSON (running against Dwight D. Eisenhower)
WHAT HE SHOULD HAVE SAID - You want a president who can't even pronounce the word "nuclear"?
WHAT HE ACTUALLY SAID - Let's talk sense to the American people! Let's tell them the truth, that there are no gains without pains.

1956: ADLAI STEVENSON (running against Eisenhower the second time)
WHAT HE SHOULD HAVE SAID - Four years in office and the man still can't pronounce "nuclear." And watch out for that Nixon. He's bad news, trust me.
WHAT HE ACTUALLY SAID - We must face the grim reality that 30 million Americans are trying to make ends meet on less than $2,000 a year.

1968: HUBERT HUMPHREY (running against Richard Nixon)
WHAT HE SHOULD HAVE SAID - Look, you hippie kids, I know you wanted McCarthy or Bobby Kennedy and you wound up with me. I know the country's going to hell in a handbasket. I know you don't like me. But if you take me down, you've just elected President Nixon. So it looks like you're stuck with me. Now would you go to the damn Republican convention and riot there instead?!
WHAT HE ACTUALLY SAID - This campaign is about the politics of joy!

1972: GEORGE McGOVERN (running against Richard Nixon)
WHAT HE SHOULD HAVE SAID - We're still in Vietnam. The economy's going down the tubes. Cities are crumbling. And if you think Nixon wasn't somehow involved with the Watergate affair, I'd like some of whatever you're smoking.
WHAT HE ACTUALLY SAID - I'm behind Senator Eagleton 1,000 percent.

1980: JIMMY CARTER (running against Ronald Reagan)
WHAT HE SHOULD HAVE SAID - I'm just warning you, once these conservative nuts get into power, they're going to be around for an awfully long time.
WHAT HE ACTUALLY SAID - (Um, he pretty much did say that. People just didn't like him.)

1984: WALTER MONDALE (running against Ronald Reagan)
WHAT HE SHOULD HAVE SAID - If you think that cutting taxes for the rich and mindlessly chanting "U.S.A.!" makes things better for the poor and middle class, then you probably also think Nancy Reagan telling you to "Just Say No" is going to make the drug problem go away. And the man may have a winning personality, but he's 152 years old. I'm just saying.
WHAT HE ACTUALLY SAID - I'm going to raise taxes.

1988: MICHAEL DUKAKIS (running against George H.W. Bush)
WHAT HE SHOULD HAVE SAID - George Bush called Reagan's economic plan "voodoo economics" -- until he became his running mate. He was pro-choice -- until it became politically inconvenient. Now he's running around talking about "a thousand points of light" while running racist ads against me. The man is a flip-flopper and can't be trusted!
WHAT HE ACTUALLY SAID - This election isn't about ideology, it's about competence.

2000: AL GORE (running against George W. Bush)
WHAT HE SHOULD HAVE SAID - It's simple. Eight years of peace and prosperity minus marital infidelity and Whitewater equals me, Al Gore. See you January 20.
WHAT HE ACTUALLY SAID - Lockbox. . (rolling eyes)

2004: JOHN KERRY (running against George W. Bush)
WHAT HE SHOULD HAVE SAID - Are you better off than you were four years ago?
WHAT HE ACTUALLY SAID - I did NOT shoot myself in the ass in Vietnam in 1969!

2008: BARACK OBAMA (running against John McCain)
WHAT HE SHOULD HAVE SAID - Are you kidding me?! Elect a guy who wants to continue the Bush tax cuts and the war in Iraq -- two of the most disastrous and boneheaded decisions in recent American history?! Look, you may not know exactly what I stand for, but two things I DON'T stand for are enormous budget deficits and this damn war.
WHAT HE ACTUALLY SAID - Yes we can!

Comments

[zendem1]

Did the watergate story break before the 1972 election? Hmm..nah, couldn't have. Oh well..
The democrats have always overestimated the intelligence of the American electorate, and can never quite get past the concept that emotion trumps intellect every time.

[SethBLiNK]

How do you know what Obama is going to say against John McCain. That campaign hasn't started yet.

Besides, Barack was doing Fired Up and Ready to Go before Yes We Can. I'm sure once the landscape and the opponent changes, so will the words.

[Rescisco]

Most of the time it makes absolutely no difference what they say. Adlai knew he wasn't going to beat a war hero. During the 1952 campaign, Stevenson encountered an enthusiastic woman who shouted out "Governor, every thoughtful American will vote for you!" Without missing a beat, Adlai shouted back "Madam, that won't be enough! We need a majority!" In 1972, McGovern came to know a peace candidate never wins. It seemed to liberate him. At a stop near the end of the campaign he invited a conservative heckler to "kiss my ass!" thus joining Fred Harris (whose campaign slogan for his short lived 1972 presidential campaign was "No More Bullshit!") as a truly great and honest speach maker in my book! "Losers" do seem to speak the truth more frequently and more memorably. Winners never have a chance to stop lying long enough to say anything truthful. Poor bastards.

[DontSpin]

You're predicting that Obama will lose? We'll see.

[sparkandy]

He's probably trying to tell you that little 'inspiring' slogans don't work - on everyone. Obviously Obama's 'Yes we can!' is working on some, but I think the author is trying to say, if the Democrats want to win this time, they'll have to come up with something that will attract fed up Republicans and Independents. 'Yes we can!' isn't going to be enough for people who are actually trying to think this thing through.

[tbone99]

Yes there's only so much fence you can straddle before you fall off.In his bid to gain Repug votes B.O. doesn't dare run as an anti war candidate or a populist.His signs say Yes We Can , not Out of Iraq Now or an End to Poverty.
While Dems are hoping for economic justice, Repugs are hoping for permanant tax cuts and an end to the estate tax. While Dems are seeing universal health care , Repugs are seeing no mandates.
Obamaites want to believe it can all be done around the campfire while roasting marsh mallows, just us, Excelon and Merck.But it may be Obama who ends up on the fork.

[niikeb]

Ike and Reagan win easily anyway. But the rest were total screw ups.

[DennyCrane]

2008: HILLARY CLINTON (running against John McCain)
WHAT SHE SHOULD HAVE SAID - Look, I'm sorry I'm not Barack Obama, I'm sorry I'm not inspiring, I'm sorry I voted for the Iraq war and yes, Bill isn't going to just be first spouse. But come on. It's either me or the old guy who has a bad temper, who wants to keep us in Iraq for 100 years, and by his own admission doesn't have a clue about the economy.
WHAT SHE ACTUALLY SAID - I'm ready on day one!

[Tony Sachs]

Hey, that's a good one! Thanks!

[KidMeNot]

Unfortunately she'll probably run a competence over ideology campaign like Dukakis. No matter who runs against McCain, they have to remember to run against him, not just Bush.

[not one of the sheep]

That is priceless and spot on.

[Shake-A-Spear]

Still a chance to use foresight to prevent bitter hindsigt. Out with the cutesy slogans, the rhythmic rally chants. This ain't kindergarten nor are the Republicans pussycats. They stop at nothing on their way to eviscerating you. So Dems ... throw out the sing-song crap and hit 'em in the groin on the way to the main event. Make a case against their total incompetence. Then, come November, administer a good one-two punch while they're still doubled over. Let's WIN this time!

[timm0]

Oh I get it - Obama's a loser. You're so terribly clever, sir! With such brilliant intellectual insight and shrewdness, there's nothing holding you back from a successful career working the frog-launcher game at a traveling carnival.

[Dangoodbar]

A simple solution to a complex issue is almost always a stupid and bone headed solution.

The problem is that Americans tend to think nuance is bad.

Worse, the media will crucify anyone who demonstrates flexibility as untrustworthy and weak.

Reality is that complex issues have many variables. Reality is a change in anyone of those variables will change the competence of any solution. Reality is that complex issues need flexible and complex solutions.

Or to put another way:

The first thing Democrats need to say and have needed to say is:

NUANCE GOOD.

[desmirl]

The only thing that can defeat the Democrats in November is NOT TELLING THE TRUTH! Deficits! Balance of Trade! Unemployment! Stagflation! Outsourcing! The War in Iraq! But then again, THEY ARE DEMOCRATS (eye roll...).

[song]

count on the democrats to claw deafeat out of the jaws of victory ..... ~_~