THE BLOG
11/28/2012 03:15 pm ET Updated Jan 28, 2013

Romnesia Could Send George P. Bush and the GOP Into the Bush Leagues

King George III has announced his arrival.

I mean George P. Bush, of the Bushes of Texas.

He filed forms with the Texas Ethics Commission to appoint a campaign treasurer to run for office.

Of course, he isn't a monarch, but his completed form for filing was received as if he was the heir to the Bush dynasty.

But hold your horses, Texas millionaires. When y'all go hunting with George P.'s treasurer, remember this: Instead of a dynasty, lingering Romnesia could send the GOP into the Bush leagues.

Here's why.

In politics, timing is everything. George Prescott Bush may have missed the boat (immigrant metaphor intended). He needed to run for office, any office, and he would have won -- before Nov. 6, 2012.

The recent presidential election witnessed the ascent of the Latino electorate, and that was the last election where immigration would be seen as the only Latino issue.

As Republicans scramble to come to terms with their anti-immigrant policies, they also need to come to terms with the term "Latino." It's a complicated calculus, and the GOP is still on basic math when it comes to understanding us.

But here are some hints for them.

First, the GOP needs smarter, cooler tutors. Whoever dreamed up the term "Romnesia" for the Obama camp should be set for life. That was the word used to remind America of how Mitt Romney, failed presidential candidate, would seemingly forget past answers to questions and provide new answers to the same question. The impression being that he was either lying, he was dumb, or he had amnesia.

Here are some ways the GOP must avoid Romnesia.

So, was Mitt Romney Mexican or not?

The Romneys of Mexico brilliantly manipulated citizenship laws, immigration laws, and bigamy laws to avoid prosecution in one country and to build wealth across both countries. Ironically, it's that same glib border crossing (puns intended) that caught up to the Romneys. Mitt lost his presidential bid for many reasons, including a lack of authenticity about where he came from, reportedly resorting to spray painting himself brown for a debate on Spanish TV (he did look fly, though). He was even recorded lamenting that the election would have been easier if he was Latino.

Actually, the choice was his to be Latino or not.

So is George P. Bush Latino?

There is someone whispering in a millionaire's ear telling him that George will win Latinos over to the GOP.

This presidential election proved that Latino voters are a lot more sophisticated than we are given credit for.

Let's start with his name: George P. Bush. The "P" is for Prescott.

"Prescott" is the least Latino name on earth. That's the name children of the 99 percent use to stereotype children of the 1 percent. Just saying...

His full name is George Prescott Garnica Bush, as in the Garnicas of Mexico.

His mom was born in Mexico. Like Mitt, he can choose to embrace that. Unlike Mitt, George P. Bush does not need a spray tan. He resembles me. However, that summons another series of expectations and nuances that are currently beyond the capacity of the GOP to understand.

For example, mainstream media reports that George P. speaks Spanish. It's true. However, he speaks Spanish terribly.

Of course, a Latino candidate's relationship to Spanish is another example of calculus. If Prescott is characterized as a multi-generational Mexican-American, his inability to speak Spanish well could be mitigated. But this positioning is science fiction for the current GOP.

Here's a link to a 2009 interview of George P. Bush in Spanish alongside the grandson of Lyndon B. Johnson. Yes, there is enough irony in this video for a book. However, I am including this to be nice.

Jorge's Spanish could not possibly have gotten worse in the three years since then. If he was a serious candidate, he should have been practicing. So the next time you see George Bush speak Spanish, there's no way it won't be better than this.

Finally, history and luck are not on the side of George P. Bush the way they were on the side of his predecessors; his grandfather George H. Bush served in Congress in Texas and then went on to become the 41st president, and his uncle George W. Bush served as governor of Texas and then went on to become the 43rd president.

However, P. Bush merely announced his intention to consider running for office the day after the presidential election that not only saw the ascent of the Latino electorate but also the ascent of Julian and Joaquin Castro, of the Castros of San Antonio. Simply imagining Ivy League Chicanos was science fiction to the GOP strategy team of George H. Bush's reign.

Can you say, "Wonder Twin Powers-Activate!" (I'll be writing way more on that in subsequent columns). By the way, the Castros do not speak Spanish -- but no one in the world would question whether or not they are authentically Mexican-American.

And speaking of his grandfather, as you recall -- or can Google -- then-Vice President George H. Bush infamously introduced his grandson to President Reagan as one of their "little brown ones."

I, and most Latino pundits, have a column titled, "The Little Brown One Goes to Washington" ready to publish the day George P. finally decides to run for a national office.

Well, first, he needs to run for a real state-wide office. Reports indicate he will vie to become land commissioner.

With his pedigree, anything less than governor or senator is like running for Dog Catcher.

Oh, he can't run for senator because he threw his support behind Ted Cruz in a bloody Republican primary and helped him get elected. He best not ask Cruz for advice on the Latino demographic. Cruz can repay Bush for his support by not inviting him to any more tea parties any time soon.

But his fate and the fate of the GOP is in his own hands.

He just needs to remember one important thing.

This ain't your granddaddy's Texas, Prescott.