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10/09/2012 01:47 pm ET Updated Dec 09, 2012

Nobel Physics Prize Winners May Eradicate 'My Watch Is Slow' Excuse Forever

By Juli Weiner, Vanity Fair

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Illustration by Juli Weiner

Nobel week continues with today's distinction, Physics. Ooh, not AP Physics? Tough break. No, don't worry -- colleges will probably definitely be impressed by run-of-the-mill physics, too!

The winners: David Wineland of the United States and Serge Haroche of France, who "have managed to measure and control fragile quantum states that were previously thought to be impossible to observe directly." Huh! And this is significant because ... let us get it ... um ... obviously... the discovery has ... well, it ... Schrödinger's cat, naturally ..."has led to the construction of extremely precise clocks and helped scientists take the first steps toward building superfast computers." Thank you CBS News -- One Nobel prize in Saying What We Were Totally About to Say.

But are "extremely precise clocks" something the world really needs? There are many advantages to extremely imprecise clocks, for example, when they are scapegoats. Other advantages include: an excuse to go shopping for a new watch.

Nobel Gold Medal Total
U.S.: 1.
Japan: 1.
France: 1.
Britain: 1.

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