At different points you find yourself re-evaluating the relationships with the people in your life. Sometimes this evaluation is forced upon us and other times it comes organically. For me the pruning of friendships came during a time of adversity. There's nothing like trials to show a persons true colors. Up until that point, I knew a lot of people and considered many of them friends. I could call on any one of them at any time and they would be there for me. So I thought. But it was during a trying time that I really found out that not everyone can go. It was a turning point in life that forced me to examine which relationships served me well and which didn't. I asked myself what and whom did I need in my life to move forward. The end result was a very small group of people whom I can probably count on one hand that literally have my back through thick and thin.
When we're children we have our childhood friends who we swear will be our best friends for life. Sometimes you move, go off to college and those relationships change. You try to maintain the bond you shared by emailing, texting, calls and even face time, but often it's just not enough and you grow apart. As we get older we marry, have children, divorce and we fall out of touch with people. Life gets in the way. It doesn't mean that we don't still care about these relationships, but we are in a different phase in our lives in which we need different things. The friends we had as children, may not serve us as well as when we're adults. New relationships will come to replace the old ones. Maybe the old ones will even be rekindled. The universe gives you who and what you need, when you need it and its ok.
In Judy Robinetts' book, 'The Power Connector' she discusses a strategy for how to build strategic relationships. Although this is a business book she talks about how our relationships influence our lives, our attitude, beliefs and the opportunities available to us in every facet of life. If you understand these relationships you can leverage them to obtain maximum value. Which brings me to the concept of Top 5. I'm not talking about the top 5 greatest rap artists or the movie, but I'm referring to who are the top five people in your life. There is an expression that says to look at the 5 people in your life if you want to know who you are. You are a sum total of those people. These people are closest to you. Maybe you connect to them daily and maybe you don't. Daily connection isn't necessary for this group.
Every woman needs a tribe of women to nourish her. Though we gain and shed friends all the time, there are five women friends you should always keep in your life:
The cheerleader
She supports you in all of you endeavors and blasts your accomplishments to the world. She's just as passionate about what you're doing as you are because she understands that when you succeed, everyone succeeds. Next to family she couldn't be more proud of you.
The connector
This girlfriend knows everyone or has access to a vast network of people and she's happy to share it with you. She understands that connections make the world go round and always has a recommendation for a business, hair salon, personal shopper, pet sitter etc. If you move to a new city she knows at least 5 people to connect you with once you move there.
The adventurer
She's down for anything. She loves to travel or try something new at the drop of a hat. She will scare you and challenge you at the same time because she has such a no holds barred approach to life. Because of her, your experiences are vast and you've grown a great deal.
The ride or die
Like the cheerleader, she is also your biggest supporter. She differs because she is with you through the good and bad. When life throws you lemons, she's helps smash them to make lemonade. She's the one who will help you hide the body when you're trying to get rid of that terrible ex (That's a joke).
The sister
You can share anything with each other. She's there to cry with you, when life goes awry. She's there to help you pack when you move to a new city, plans your bridal shower, baby shower and is the maid/matron of honor in your wedding. There's nothing she wouldn't do for you. She's the keeper of all your hopes and dreams. She encourages you in every way, tells you when you're dead wrong and acting crazy, but most of all she prays for you.
Who are the top 5 women in your life and are they serving you well? Or do they need to be rotated to a lesser position?