Huffpost Women
THE BLOG

Featuring fresh takes and real-time analysis from HuffPost's signature lineup of contributors

Vicki Donlan Headshot

Are Women in Business Prisoners of Their Own Minds?

Posted: Updated:

Why is it that so many women consistently sabotage themselves in business? Why do women in business, particularly corporate women, insist on allowing their mind to run away from reality even when it is staring them in the face? The question really is why do so many women become prisoners of their own mind?

Does this sound like you? Do you spend a lot of time thinking about what is wrong in your life and work rather than imagining a solution? Do you feel imprisoned by what others want you to do? Are you following rather than leading? Do you wake up each day with the intention of being productive only to find that one hour into your day the work you need to accomplish seems out of your control?

YOU ARE A PRISONER OF YOUR OWN MIND!

THIS IS YOUR FREE BLOG TO GET OUT OF JAIL!

You've heard the expression, "If you can't do the time, don't do the crime," well in this case the crime is what you are wasting your time on -- stinkin' thinkin'!

It's time to engage in some self-improvement activities and let go of worry and fear which are the biggest time wasters in your life.

First, you must start by identifying what you are worried about. Give your full attention to the worry and think through the worse case scenario of your fear. Now, answers these questions: Will it kill you? Will it end your career? Will it change your life forever? As you consider these questions notice how you feel. Stress can change your breathing and literally make you feel sick. Do you feel sick from thinking through your fears and worries?

Then STOP RIGHT NOW! You are imprisoned by stinkin' thinkin' and it is time to learn a new way to address your worries and fears. Your future will be determined by how well you turn your concerns into opportunities. Try this instead.

Once you have identified what you are worried about imagine how you would like the scenario to play out. Think through each detail completely and envision it working out to your benefit. If you believe it, you can achieve it. This is not a cliche. It is the power of positive thinking. You must be able to believe in your success in order to live it. When we see the future working out for us, stress disappears and we are filled with anticipation for tomorrow. Tomorrow is the beginning of the future and we all have the ability to start fresh each day.

Women in business too often feel that they have no alternatives and worry about situations that haven't even happened yet. We can't allow ourselves to become prisoners of our own minds when the truth is the future and is bright and we have choices that can make all the differences. The women who follow along to avoid the pain of standing up for themselves eventually realize that conflict is unavoidable. Therefore, if confronting your fears and worries is inevitable the sooner you do it the quicker you will recover and move forward. "Quitters never win and winners never quit." This IS a cliche you can depend on.

It's time to lead not follow. It's time to use your mind to imagine what the outcome of your fears and worries can be when you take action rather than allow circumstances to evolve on their own. Most of the time your worries and fears will not happen. So vow to change your thinking and free yourself by working on positive thoughts.

My best advice is to respect and believe in yourself and your ability to create the vision you want to live. Trust yourself to know that your actions will allow situations to turn out in your favor.

Women in business and women entrepreneurs are the future of the American economy, but we must free ourselves from beliefs that hinder our success. We truly are what we think and freedom from worry and fear is the key.

This post is part of a series produced by The Huffington Post in conjunction with our women's conference, "The Third Metric: Redefining Success Beyond Money & Power," which took place in New York on June 6, 2013. To read all of the posts in the series and learn more about the conference, click here. Join the conversation on Twitter #ThirdMetric.