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Vicki Iovine

Entries by Vicki Iovine

Top Ten Activities to Keep the Valentine's Day Blues at Bay

(28) Comments | Posted February 14, 2011 | 10:17 AM

Divorce isn't one big catastrophic event, but rather a series of little murders to the heart. The most violently homicidal of them is Valentine's Day. Between card shops, florists, restaurants and jewelers insisting that February 14 is a high holy day for romance and the delusion that all couples are...

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The Ten Biggest Misconceptions About Divorce

(119) Comments | Posted November 11, 2010 | 8:38 AM

It's been about a year and a half since my divorce after 24 years of marriage: Four kids, four businesses, five moves and at least twenty pets over a quarter century. When we decided to separate, I was full of sadness, hope, failure, loneliness and excitement. I immediately began the...

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Girlfriends' Guide: How Do You Solve a Problem Like Mel Gibson?

(426) Comments | Posted July 18, 2010 | 8:53 AM

I've been on summer vacay, professionally known as a hiatus, but even fun in the sun couldn't distract me from the Mel Gibson debacle calling to me from supermarket checkout lines to the evening news to family dinner conversations.

He's a beast, isn't he? Rage, mixed...

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Girlfriends' Guide: Tipper and Al Separate: Congratulations to Them

(185) Comments | Posted June 4, 2010 | 8:30 AM

Here's my question: What took them so long? Think about it: the Gores are two dynamic, intelligent and passionate people who have met everyone and been everywhere. Their lives have been filled with options and inspirations, seductions and distractions. Who wouldn't be tempted to wonder what it would be like...

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Girlfriends' Guide to Teenagers: Smells Like Teen Spirit -- All Over My House!

(85) Comments | Posted May 21, 2010 | 9:44 AM

Last Friday, I titled my blog, "We'll Remember Always, Graduation Day" and was told several times by readers that I needed to clean up my syntax. Really?? Doesn't anyone remember the Beach Boys' cover of a song that was first made popular by my mother's heartthrobs, the Four Freshmen? It's...

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Girlfriends' Guide to Teenagers: 'We'll Remember Always Graduation Day'

(31) Comments | Posted May 14, 2010 | 9:15 AM

I never pictured myself one of those sentimental mothers who would add emotional significance to Senior Prank Night or Mystery Night. I felt more contemporary than that. I could relate to the excitement and sense of anarchy that accompanied the sigh of relief and pride in surviving the gauntlet...

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Girlfriends' Guide to Teenagers: Momma Does Coachella!

(36) Comments | Posted April 23, 2010 | 9:17 AM

Ok, so maybe I wasn't really the very oldest person at the three-day festival in the Indio desert last weekend, but I was certainly the most improbable person in the daily crowd of 78,000. I missed Woodstock, but in my teens I had more than my share of dusty and...

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Girlfriends' Guide to Teenagers: School Bullies Hit Parents Where It Hurts

(518) Comments | Posted April 2, 2010 | 8:06 AM

I've been working on this blog since the beginning of the week when 9 teenagers were finally indicted for various crimes that appear to have led to the suicide of Phoebe Prince. Phoebe, for those of you who don't know, was a 15 year-old freshman and new student from Ireland...

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Girlfriends' Guide to Teenagers: Help Me, PLEASE!

(98) Comments | Posted March 19, 2010 | 7:52 AM

Everybody, please sit down, I have something to share with you: As of this blog, I am going to focus on a single area of concern--TEENAGERS--for the foreseeable future. Yes, you know me as the gadfly who holds forth on everything from pink pubic hair to Sarah Palin (I can't...

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Girlfriends' Guide: To Life In The Fast Lane: Why Does My Toyota Want To Kill Me?

(120) Comments | Posted March 12, 2010 | 7:20 AM

I'm navigating the road to hell in a 2010 Lexus hybrid, but I started with such good intentions. Not only am I driving a punky little four-cylinder Prius-in-designer-clothing that is the new Lexus HS250H, also known in my house as a Camry with a joystick (for onboard navigation,) but I...

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Girlfriends' Guide: FAT Is The New 'N' Word

(739) Comments | Posted February 26, 2010 | 7:39 AM

People used to be afraid to be fat; now they're afraid to say "fat." Oh, we can talk about diets and exercise and the paucity of plus-size fashions--CONSTANTLY--but we can't really use the word "fat" as an adjective anymore. Unless, of course, we're referring to ourselves and are comedic by...

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Girlfriends' Guide: Sarah Palin Is So Bitter!

(892) Comments | Posted February 19, 2010 | 8:03 AM

Does Sarah wake up every day, reach for her specs, slip in her "Bumpit" and begin snorting around the media outlets like a truffle pig in search of the juicy fungus of persecution? It's like an itch that she scratches so often it has become a tic. Every slight is...

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Girlfriends' Guide To Sleeping: 'Don't Tell Me About Your Dreams Unless They Are Sexy'

(48) Comments | Posted January 29, 2010 | 8:10 AM

Whenever someone starts a conversation by saying, "I had the most incredible dream last night," I want to stick forks in their eyes. I used to be quasi-polite about it and I would listen with eyes wide, as if to indicate interest, but a film of utter disinterest clouded my...

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Girlfriend's Guide: The REAL Secret To Staying Married: Separate Rooms

(396) Comments | Posted January 22, 2010 | 8:01 AM

A couple of Fridays ago I wrote about those moments right before I fall asleep that scare me and bring up the loneliness of being newly-divorced. The responses were many and broke down into four categories.

1. Get a dog (or cat or something else with a pulse that...

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The Girlfriends' Guide: Sleeping Single Terrifies Me

(75) Comments | Posted January 8, 2010 | 7:38 AM

If you follow my blogs, you know that I'm newly single after 24 years of marriage and four kids. I write about it now because it is Sleep Challenge 2010 and my sleep has definitely been affected. For one thing, I have become a bit phobic about going...

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Girlfriends' Guide: Tiger Woods Is A Baby, But His Wife Does A Real Man's Work

(121) Comments | Posted December 11, 2009 | 7:24 AM

This morning the news shows replayed what seems to be Elin Woods' frantic call to 911 seeking paramedics to help her mother. Did you hear it? This poor girl is half-hysterical that her mother is collapsed in agony and when the operator asks if her mother is breathing, Elin helplessly...

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Divorce, Dodgers Style

(0) Comments | Posted December 4, 2009 | 9:30 AM

Dodgers owner Frank McCourt must have savored like a sugarplum the sensation of firing his wife Jamie as CEO of the team's organization." What person who's been married for two or three decades hasn't wanted to fire their spouse? Come to think of it, I have a kid or...

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Girlfriends' Guide: The Blonde Factor

(221) Comments | Posted December 4, 2009 | 8:20 AM

There is no question in my mind that Michaele and her husband (old what's-his- name) just flew through the three security posts at the White House dinner for the Indian president because she was a confident and attractive blonde with a smile as big as Christie Brinkley's. If the Salahi's...

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Girlfriends' Guide: Christmas Can't Come Soon Enough!

(13) Comments | Posted November 13, 2009 | 7:42 AM

Christmas comes "early" this year, meaning, according to my mother, that Thanksgiving is "late" and there are not quite four weeks separating the two most elaborate and stressful American holidays. "Bring it!" I say, because the anticipation is killing me.

It started when Halloween and the end of Daylight Savings...

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Girlfriends' Guide: Why I Won't Be Asking Santa For A Bodyguard This Christmas

(18) Comments | Posted October 30, 2009 | 6:12 AM

Let's not get distracted by asking why in the world I would ever even think I might need personal protection -- my delusions are my own business. I'm just saying that, via some odd cosmic coincidence, bodyguards have been on my mind.

U2 performed in Southern California...

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