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Vivian Diller, Ph.D.

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Does Authenticity Matter Anymore?

Posted: 06/08/11 09:36 AM ET

Does anyone else question authenticity the way I do these days? Does doubt about what is "real" versus "enhanced" interfere with the trust we once had in the people we admire and applaud?

I was thinking about this while watching a recent Yankees game. An enthusiastic fan whenever the Yankees play, I found myself unusually excited as Bartolo Colon was three outs from pitching his first complete game shutout since 2006. You see, Colon is 38, not a young guy in baseball years. A Cy Young winner a while back, he is enjoying a renaissance of sorts this season, returning from ligament damage and a torn rotator cuff -- injuries I could relate to at age 57. I was rooting for him, one aging fan to one aging player. But there, in the ninth inning, a flicker of doubt crossed my mind, that lurking feeling I've been having a lot these days. It wasn't about his pitching, but about the authenticity of his performance. I thought, "Is it real?" Could I trust that his 92-mile-per-hour fastball was all his own doing?

I was annoyed that my doubts interfered with the pure pleasure of watching a great performance. I was aware that Colon's reconstructed shoulder had been under scrutiny regarding the possible use of Human Growth Hormone (one of the many substances banned from professional sports). His doctors described using a novel stem cell approach during the surgery, which had raised some suspicion about the legality of the results. I had also been following all the media attention around illegal doping by other elite athletes -- McGuire, Armstrong and Pacquiao, to name just a few. So while Colon was found free of performance-enhancing drugs, it was hard to allay my mistrust.

What really bothered me was that my struggle with authenticity was spreading way beyond sports. It hit me during my son's college graduation. I watched thousands of students receive their diplomas; one by one making that proud walk to the podium with huge smiles, handshakes and hugs. As their honors were called -- Cum Laude, Magna Cum Laude, Summa Cum Laude -- I applauded their accomplishments, just as I had each of Colon's strikeouts. Yet again, I found myself doubting: Were these achievements real? How many of these kids used study enhancers -- like Adderall and Ritalin -- to attain these honors?

I work with college-aged patients in my psychotherapy practice, so I know that many are using their friends' prescription drugs for study purposes. High school and college students tell me they rely on ADHD medications to work on their papers and cram for exams. Recent studies show that there is rampant abuse by students between ages 18 and 22 today, with one out of every 10 saying they have tried or depend on ADHD medications to get through their college course work. These "study buddies" (as these meds are casually called) are used by students with or without a learning disability diagnosis, a fact I found hard to ignore at my son's the graduation. How many of those Summa Cum Laudes would have gotten their awards had they not been aided by stimulants? We may never know.

And what about the issue of authenticity in the looks department? With airbrushing, Photoshop and plastic surgery, it's hard to believe anyone's appearance is real anymore -- on screen or off. I remember watching the Golden Globes earlier this year trying to stay focused on the work for which each actor was being honored. Instead, I found myself scrutinizing the "work" that had possibly been done on their faces. I was excited to see Annette Bening receive Best Actress for "The Kids Are All Right," not only for her achievement in the film, but for how gorgeous she looked at age 55. Yet there it was, my lurking doubt: Was Bening's beauty authentic? Had she miraculously managed to avoid the radical anti-aging efforts that had destroyed the faces of her peers? Or had she simply gone about it more subtly?

I have men in my practice who tell me that upon meeting women these days, one of their first thoughts is, "Are her breasts real?" The younger the guy, the more often they assume their girlfriends will have implants. Sometimes they say they don't like the plastic look, but big breasts are beginning to be an expected female asset. One woman I worked with told me she was given a gift from her fiancé -- a visit to a cosmetic surgeon for breast enhancement. He wanted double Ds. They settled for Ds. They were happy with the results, but I won't be surprised if I hear from them for some marital therapy in the future.

Doubts about men's appearance exist, too. Women tell me they wonder if their mates would be bald if Propecia or Rogaine weren't at work. Others question their date's sexual prowess. They speculate whether it's their own sex appeal providing the arousal or Viagra and Cialis that are helping them "last through the night."

The list sadly goes on: people wondering if their friends look great because of restful vacations or recent face lifts? If improved bodies result from diet and exercise or liposuction? Great hair styles or hair extensions? Blue eyes or blue contacts? Thick lashes or drug induced eyelash growth? Where do we draw the line? Will the next generation even know the difference? And does it matter?

Imagine receiving a jeweled watch that turns out to be a knock-off of the real thing; perhaps presented in a Cartier box as if it was an original piece from the reknowned jewelry line. Would we be turned off by the chicanery, annoyed by the lack of integrity? Might we have enjoyed a more flawed but genuine gift over one that looks perfect but isn't real? Why are we not more incensed about the growing lack of authenticity all around us?

Bill James, a sports historian and statistician, thought he had the answer to this question, as least in terms of how he saw this trend going in baseball:

If we look into the future, then, we can reliably foresee a time in which everybody is going to be using steroids or their pharmaceutical descendants. We will learn to control the health risks of these drugs, or we will develop alternatives to them. Once that happens, people will start living to age 200 or 300 or 1,000, and doctors will begin routinely prescribing drugs to help you live to be 200 or 300 or 1,000. If you look into the future 40 or 50 years, I think it is quite likely that every citizen will routinely take anti-aging pills every day. How, then, are those people of the future -- who are taking steroids every day -- going to look back on baseball players who used steroids? They're going to look back on them as pioneers. They're going to look back at it and say 'So what?'

I would like to believe that there are areas of life that will remain free from the growing trend described by James above. As a therapist, my work is focused on helping people discover and enjoy their authentic selves. I take comfort in the idea that modern medicine cannot truly alter our character or personalities -- at least not yet. Innovative procedures may prolong our health. Pills may ease emotional issues along the way. But in the end, it's not really possible to enrich or enhance who we are as individuals without working on ourselves from the inside out, or without authentic hard work.

Authenticity is a word being thrown around a lot these days; some say it's even coming back in vogue. But its value may be thrown out as passé in years to come unless we learn to appreciate it now.

Is there something authentic that you care about? How do you suggest we retain its value?

Vivian Diller, Ph.D. is a psychologist in private practice in New York City. She has written articles on beauty, aging, media, models and dancers. She serves as a consultant to companies promoting health, beauty and cosmetic products. "Face It: What Women Really Feel As Their Looks Change" (2010), written with Jill Muir-Sukenick, Ph.D. and edited by Michele Willens, is a psychological guide to help women deal with the emotions brought on by their changing appearances. For more information, please visit FaceItTheBook.comVivianDiller.com. Friend Vivian on Facebook at facebook.com/Readfaceit, or continue the conversation on Twitter.

 
 
 

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Does anyone else question authenticity the way I do these days? Does doubt about what is "real" versus "enhanced" interfere with the trust we once had in the people we admire and applaud? I was thin...
Does anyone else question authenticity the way I do these days? Does doubt about what is "real" versus "enhanced" interfere with the trust we once had in the people we admire and applaud? I was thin...
 
 
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
maori
12:45 PM on 06/26/2011
Plastic surgery has nothing to do with personal authenticity.

If you're phony, shallow and mean without surgery, you'll be that way with it.
07:59 AM on 06/13/2011
I'm so glad Dr. Diller is contributing to this section on Huff Post Women. I always look forward to reading her pieces.

Thanks Dr. Diller for offering such interesting insights about our culture. Authenticity (which I see as being genuine and real) is an issue that we all need to be cognizant about so that we don't lose sight of what is important. This is especially true for women who are pressured to be inauthentic in so many ways.
10:31 AM on 06/11/2011
Dr. Diller, I think you raise two very different issues. On the one hand, I disagree about image-enhancements. I don't see them as a threat to authenticity but as an expression of one's authentic vision of beauty. Everything from haircuts to filing one's nails is "fake", ie that is not how one would look completely "au naturale". However, I agree that the pervasive use of performance enhancements in sports and academics is a threat to authenticity. It is a reflection of how driven we have become as a society. We have become more obsessed with being the best, usually because we want to make the most money. Parents these days are obsessed with early childhood development, hoping making their three year old the youngest to enter Harvard. Then there are the drugs kids are taking to increase test performance that you mentioned. Young adults pursue certain high power careers even if it doesn't match their gifts and interests. Hopefully, authenticity will become vogue again and we will allow ourselves to just be; to pursue our passions instead of an increased income, and to play sports because we enjoy them.
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HUFFPOST BLOGGER
DrVivian
Clinical Psychologist and author of Face It
09:33 AM on 06/12/2011
Very thoughtful comment. Thanks for taking time to raise these issues.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Roger Ochs
ribald raconteur
10:22 AM on 06/11/2011
As I watched my 40 year old Daughter receive her B.A. should I have been concerned about the potential drug use of her fellow graduates? I think not. This was a moment to reflect on her achievements. That she did this while raising 3 children as a single, Mom while holding full time employment and volunteering as a coach at the local CYO, and still keeping her 3.98 GPA was more than enough for me. That others may have resorted to chemical aid is not my concern. She is.

That you would root for the Yankees may be revelatory of a deep seated character flaw. (Do you also cheer on the IRS?) But that you can't simply enjoy the moment is quite sad. When Clemens pitched to McGuire and both were "juiced"was it not an equal contest? It is good to examine the issues but it is excessive to let those issues spoil the enjoyment of life.
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HUFFPOST BLOGGER
DrVivian
Clinical Psychologist and author of Face It
09:40 AM on 06/12/2011
I view most experiences from different perspectives, even when attending what ordinarily are great celebrations: be they graduations, weddings or birthdays. I reflect on the positive and negatives in order to understand their meaning, both from a personal perspective and a larger one. Yet I still manage to enjoy myself.

I think you have a lot to be proud of about your daughter. Congratulations on her graduation. And, thanks for taking time to comment.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
slvrfox857
questionevrthing.blogspot.com
08:38 AM on 06/11/2011
I was recently in a conversation with a friend who admits to having had a few cosmetic procedures done, botox,eyelid work, etc. She is beautiful, and was before. But in my opinion, the most beautiful middle aged women are the ones who embrace the changes that life brings to their appearance. The phrase, "comfortable in her skin" comes to mind. When an inner beauty is achieved, there is no need for all that surface enhancement. The breast thing-I heard a fashion designer talk about the cycles of what is considered beautiful about them; in the 50s, it was the torpedoes to a point, now it is as if a woman has two half grapefruits stuck to her chest. He believed it will change, as all fashions do. I hope so. The fake ones are pretty obvious, and make a friendly hug a little uncomfortable. I can't speak to anything else about them. I've been a natural double D for a long time. I do sometimes with I could have them pulled off the sidewalk without industrial strength wires.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
MerrieWay
04:13 AM on 06/10/2011
They're addictive...bad news.
01:19 PM on 06/09/2011
Take heart, Vivian, people who are at their core, authentic, cannot be otherwise. They attract others, and generally, inspire them. I doubt the ratio across the population is different now than it's ever been.
We humans are a bumbling group, with a tendency toward conformity - which makes us feel safe. Psychological and spiritual growth requires leaps of faith into the unknown, and the extreme discomfort of examining our own unpleasantness and our fears. Such a short time ago, the vast majority of humanity was primarily concerned with basic survival, and many still are. We've often seemed to confuse technological advancement with our evolution as a species.

With respect to the drug abuse of your college aged clients, I'd stress concern more for the drugs' addictive qualities and side effects (insomnia, heart problems) than any potential greek honors. Amphetemines are not new, nor do they turn an average person into a genius. Besides, where cheating is concerned, the good old fashioned kind is rampant, socially acceptable, and easier than ever before (went to school in the 80s, and back again now).

At the end of the day, new boobs or not, we all roost within our selves. People are propelled toward growth and authenticity from within, and in their own good time. In the past, we've looked to external circumstances to make us whole and fulfilled; marriage, parenthood, achievement and recognition, wealth, a nice house - today's preoccupations aren't too different.
01:40 PM on 06/09/2011
I have to add that in spite of the yucky stuff I witness at school, I am every day fortunate to encounter many wonderfully intelligent, engaged, curious, kind, polite, and focused students. I hope I will be lucky enough to witness some of them on their (authentic) paths.

Check out Arianna's bit in the link below, particularly the students (and the squirrels):

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/arianna-huffington/memorial-day-lessons-from_b_868799.html?ir=Healthy%20Living
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Beka13
Veni vidi vici
09:35 AM on 06/09/2011
(Part 2)...I do color my hair, but not to cover the grey just to help them to be my natural highlights. So I would consider myself to be 95% real all the time.

I feel bad for people that care so much about what people think about them that they would risk possible death and bankruptcy; however, I think everyone is entitled to do what they want as long as its not hurting anyone else. The slippery slope with being fake is if you are not honest in your fakeness then you are hurting other people by lying when your intentions are to please them and if someone loves the fake you then you never really know if they would love the real you. In either one of those cases, you are hurting others and you are hurting yourself so please strive to be real for your own sake and for the sake of those you love.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Ocheco
11:45 AM on 06/11/2011
Bankruptcy...nailed it all right there...well said
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Beka13
Veni vidi vici
09:35 AM on 06/09/2011
I used to be OK with plastic surgery until several years ago when I had a non-cosmetic outpatient surgery which required full anesthesia. It was so painful, uncomfortable and scary to be under like that that it really made me rethink that position. So I decided that I will not have any unneccessary surgery...EVER. My reasonings are 2 fold, the philosophical concept of you are not presenting who you really are and the psychological concept that you are so unhappy with your outward appearance that you would in essence have a doctor cut you to make you feel better. So with that in mind, what is the difference between someone who would cut themselves in the bathroom so the controlled physical pain can help their uncontrolled emotional pain besides billions of dollars for the medical industry?

I only wear make up for special occasions and more as an artistic statement, I wash my face and use preventative creams, I excercise and eat the best I can, I never straighten my hair, if I dont know the answer to a question I admit it then google it so I know for future referrence and I always tell people that my expensive looking clothes and shoes are always off the clearance rack...
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french queen13
my beloved is mine and I am his
08:09 PM on 06/08/2011
On the looks department, when has "authenticity" ever had that much of a role in fashionable society? Enhancing or changing the appearance goes back millennia. Makeup, wigs, corsets, high heels, jewellery, clothing - they all play their part in the way people present themselves. Even cosmetic surgery isn't new, just more sophisticated.

On the sporting/academic front, I'd say, rather than use "authentic" (which is starting to sound like an overused buzz word), what about asking if doing such-and-such is cheating?

What's authentic that I care about? My beloved comes to mind, and he's not subject to earthly vagaries. Cats ... authentic because they don't give a stuff what the servants think! :)
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
slvrfox857
questionevrthing.blogspot.com
08:40 AM on 06/11/2011
Very good point about doing things to enhance our looks. And you are right, it has been done for millenia. In the 18th century, the powder women used was made with arsenic, and made many women very sick. Fanned.
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french queen13
my beloved is mine and I am his
06:28 PM on 06/11/2011
Thank you, and likewise!

Yes, the contents of makeup over the centuries is hair-raising. Red and white lead for face paint in the 16th century, arsenic soap in the 19th, black lead for hair colouring ... and there's the story (which may be urban myth, I'm not sure) about women having ribs taken out to allow an even smaller waistline in the most heavily corsetted decades of the 19th century. Which, if true, would have been even riskier than cosmetic surgery now, given the level of understanding of sepsis then!
02:35 PM on 06/08/2011
Speaking of being real, what's so incredibly real about the U.S., a dominant force at this critical point in the history of the world's survival, measuring those with the serious potential to lead, not by intelligent values, but in terms of Leave It To Beaver values? One need not be an advocate for divorce to appreciate that, in this day and age, Weiner's line-crossing is miniscule compared with the kinds of line-crossing he would protect us against. Unreal.
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Lawson Meadows
Plant in your kids, the seeds of greatness!
02:09 PM on 06/08/2011
Dr. Diller,

At first, I thought “so what!” The placement on the techno-medical development scale of dentures and glasses is followed by more advanced products such as dental implants and laser eye surgery, and eventually stem cell tooth re-growth and gene therapy for eyes resistant to failure. I am sure there are more products and procedures, theoretical and in testing, in response to the ubiquitous desire to achieve some ideal state.

However, what may be lost is the strength a culture, not to mention a species, gains through the existence of diversity in the characteristics and potentials from the gene pool. Setting aside the lost prediction from obvious genetic markers, and ignoring the potential for gene therapy to change all that, the process of regression to some commonly desired mean of existence will either produce for those who deviate enough from the norm, a status as unique and desirable or as unworthy cast-offs.

I personally have no problem with anti-aging pills, adaptive and corrective surgery, medicines that enhance, or just eating right and exercising, because your statement about the limits of enhancement without “working on oneself from the inside out” is the real key to authenticity: all the rest is mostly pretty packaging.

The reason a pig enhanced by applying lipstick is still just a pig, is because it can never change its authentic nature… humans can, but as you stated, not without hard work.

Lawson Meadows
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HUFFPOST BLOGGER
DrVivian
Clinical Psychologist and author of Face It
09:43 PM on 06/08/2011
Wonderful comment and food for thought. Thanks for taking the time to write.
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02:05 PM on 06/08/2011
Being fake requires a lot of work and effort. It takes a lie to cover the original lie and then another one to cover the cover so in the long run there will be many layers of lies and ultimately you don't even exist in the real world because the 'created you' is fake...all the stress for nothing!

It is easier and best to be authentic even when you are not liked for who you are. It is OK not to be liked by everyone and it is also OK not look like or be like everyone else. You can be the best version of yourself and each of us are genuinely good at least 10 things.
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HUFFPOST BLOGGER
DrVivian
Clinical Psychologist and author of Face It
09:45 PM on 06/08/2011
"You can be the best version of yourself and each of us are genuinely good at least 10 things."

Great perspective and solid advice. Thanks for your comment.
01:49 PM on 06/08/2011
the 'enjoy their authentic selves' concept clearly does not work if women go under knife to please men.
and what if the 'authentic selves' are not that appealing, which goes against all social theories.
after all we live in a culture in which even kindness is perceived as weakness.
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logicanada
Blogger, radio co-host, writer, editor, voice-over
01:33 PM on 06/08/2011
Reality TV is an oxymoron.