Not about Governor Sarah Palin, Just The Edwards Scandal
What a political scandal feels like to a staffer--current, former or "it's complicated"--is an awful lot like grief.
There are stages. There is the initial chaos where the stories appear fast and furious like punches only Palin, Craig, Vitter, Foley, Spitzer, and Clinton, etc staffers can understand. Each story about John Edwards's affair and cover-up is a bruising and makes you hope that the truth is on the way so they stop and you can get back to work.
There is the stage of denial. John said it was all lies before he and the lawyers even released statements. Maybe he's being quiet because he's building a libel case like Carol Burnett won against the National Enquirer? If he's still calling to discuss the convention speech, that must mean something.
There is anger. Did he really pay her that much while so many worked longer hours for much less? Did they really put out those statements? Did I just watch "When Animals Attack 2 and 3" in order to avoid picking up the phone?
There is also a stage of dark humor. How can there not be with this cast of characters: a friend named Pigeon, the Sisters Druck, a father linked to insurance fraud by having a horse electrocuted, a spiritual advisor described as an "intuitive" (clearly, still working on his craft.), the website Being is Free (thank you Deceiver.com), a rumored vasectomy, a family moved across the country so they can all live in a house right out of a script from "Big Love," a presidential campaign based on a lie, and of course, the movie, "Overboard."
There is sorrow too--far more than I ever share with people. It comes during those quiet times when I'm walking the dog; shutting the office door, or printing a speech that will never be delivered. And my heart breaks for those kids, as politics helped destroy my own family, too.
There is doubt, especially about people. How could the same man who pulled me to the front of the plane near tears as he told me his wife had cancer string together all these lies? How could I have been so stupid to defend his character after Bob Shrum's book was published? And every career decision made since I left Senator Hillary Clinton's office in 2003 is in question. Those years and work now seem so wasted.
And so yeah, a little cynicism settles in. Politics isn't the art of what's possible; it's the art of the charade. Speeches sound like Karaoke Michael Bolton and it's unclear I'll want to write another political speech again. And then slowly, acceptance creeps in. My boss is deeply flawed like the rest of them. Whether it's Watergate or a woman, my grandfather's words sung by Billie Holiday say it best; it's "the same old story, but it's new to me."
Many have said their piece, including me. I forgive John because he's my friend. I suggested some things he could do to do a better job at making amends--yes, including the obvious. I still get mad, sad, and everything in between, but I choose to forgive. Some may view that as naïve. That's just how I live because I know I'll mess up soon enough, and hope someone's there to take my hand, too.
Many will never get beyond the anger and that's understandable. Every condemnation is deserved. God knows, I swore like Dick Cheney. Unfortunately, this scandal won't go away. It will continue to hang at the edges until the paternity of the child is established. I took John at his word then and I do my best now.
But here's the really tough part of a scandal. Not how it ends or when it ends. But getting to a place where you can ask, "Can any good come of this?" Because the work thousands of people got involved with in the Senate, 2004 and 2008 shouldn't be viewed as a waste. It matters--closing the economic divides in this country matters.
It's not easy when things are still such a mess. In our own lives, it's rarely in the middle of a success and clarity that we think, "Wow. How can things be better?" It's when we are surrounded by our mistakes, in that lonely place between uncertainty and insight, where we try to find that good and build back something better. Can't this be true for a political scandal? Isn't our country covered in the scars from where our leaders fell? Can't something good come from this even if doubts linger?
Yes. It starts with something basic: how we speak about the baby. Think about how she's begun her life. Her mother is in hiding. Her name calls up too many hits on Google. Journalists demean her when they call her "Love child," "illegitimate," or "you'll be able to tell the Daddy by the way she primps her hair."
Think about what her life is going to be like. The National Enquirer has said that they will be on this story "forever." That means every time her birthday rolls around, they will take her picture and run it alongside John's. It will be on record for her to check as she grows older, for the Edwards's children to check as they grow older.
Why can't this scandal bring out that other part of humanity, the empathy part where we know that you don't say those things about a baby? Condemn the adults--all of them--but leave the child alone.
With this empathy, we should be able to listen a little better and hear what isn't being talked about in between the detailed discussions about lipstick, animals, who's lying more, and who can send an email: a meaningful discussion about ending poverty.
Whether the pundits on TV or political writers or joke-tellers want to admit it, one of the leading voices for working people and economic justice has been silenced. For the first time in forty years, we had a national leader--agree or disagree with him--who was at least willing to spend every day fighting to strengthen our middle class by 36 million people. John can no longer do that and it's his fault. But it's still a loss.
So who will fill this void? While people can rejoice in the fallen messenger, the message still stands.
There are still 36 million Americans who wake up every day in poverty and millions and millions more who live on the edge and most work. There are veterans sleeping under bridges and getting food from dumpsters while we are at war and there's no outrage. Tent cities pop up because too many are losing their homes. We now own a piece of Fannie Mae, Freddie Mac and AIG and the economy has stopped working for most Americans. The scandal didn't end any of these struggles or diminish the work at HalfinTen.org. It didn't alter a single truth about the inequities in this country. And yet, this void exists.
While the personal grief in all of this is real, the political loss may be the greatest of all if we have to wait another forty years to finish the work President Johnson and the great Sargent Shriver started all those years ago.
If another national leader could pick up the megaphone John had to put down, then that would be something good to come of this scandal, as well.
In the last speech John delivered to the AARP before the "Nightline" interview, he used a refrain, "Remember us." He had just finished giving a radio interview and we were talking in the green room and I was worried the phrase could be used in an unflattering way. He was quiet and said, "It's okay."
It's what a man in Uganda said to him. It's what a woman said to him under a bridge in New Orleans. It's what too many say in our country. What upsets me most is that this scandal can be used as an excuse to forget that woman, that man, and the work.
Everything has changed and nothing has changed since this scandal broke. There are still Two Americas and a country that longs for one. We can still cut the poverty rate in half in ten years and end it in thirty years if we as a nation choose to do so. This, too, is something good that can come of this,especially in the middle of this economic crisis. And since everyone's talking about Sarah Palin and moose these days, here's why, "Because grief unites us/like the locked antlers of moose/who die on their knees in pairs."
"Remember us." Who will now?
Loading comments…
Want to reply to a comment? Hint: Click "Reply" at the bottom of the comment; after being approved your comment will appear directly underneath the comment you replied to
I still think John Edwards should have been the nominee, it's not my job to sit in judgement
of him. I liked him before this so called affair and I still do. You said how could the same
man cry about his wife having cancer, a couple of years earlier be the same man? Well,
he can be and is because committing adultery has nothing to do with having compassion
for people including a his sick wife.
John Edwards committed a sin if he is a christian, he broke a commandment. You cannot forgive him, God will forgive him, if asks forgiveness and promises not to commit this sin again.
Certain names are given to children who are born out of wedlock, it based on laws that go back
thousands of years. You really don't expect people to change how they see things, do you.
In terms of children out of wedlock, I don't think the term love child as the tabloids calls the
child is meant as anything other than a headline, so people buy their trashy paper. This child isn't the only child born out of a relationship with a public figure, that is getting attention now and she
certainly won't be the last. It's too bad, but it's also too bad the mother of the child chose to
give birth to a child at age 43, when there is birth control available to all. It's also too bad she
chose to hit on a married man with three children and a sick wife and it's too bad she chose
to broadcast it to the entire world. If she didn't want all the horrible things that comes with this
kind of sex with a married public figure, then she should have left John Edwards alone, she
does not love him, she simply wanted money and power and decided to steal him from another
women, while he was weak emotionally.
Please check this out ... the most comprehensive page of information on Sarah Palin on the Internet ... including videos of her saying her proposed $30 billion pipeline is the “will of God,” her saying a month ago she doesn’t know what the vice-president does, and her recently praising the biggest pork barrel spender in Congress Ted Stevens -
http://dailysource. org/palin
It has in-depth research, audio clips, videos, excerpts, and links to hundreds of articles, including many from newspapers and TV stations in Alaska. It has rare footage, including her telling the ‘08 convention of the Alaska Independence Party, whose aim is to give Alaska a vote on seceding from the U.S., to “keep up the good work.” The level of research is unparalled. The site’s editors and volunteers include an Emmy-award winning CNN reporter, the former operating editor of the Monitor’s web site, the former head of NPRs News Blog and the Executive Director of the Online News Association -
http://dailysource. org/about/ team
Please repost email it to anyone who might want to know more
I just went to this web site, and it is indeed fantastic and potentially very useful to anyone discussing or debating the Palin resume and qualifications.
Wendy--
I was an Edwards supporter and contributor. I was drawn to him because, as you say so eloquently, he was a brilliant voice on the national scene talking about the class divide and poverty in this country in a way no one else is doing. I know that what happened must be enormously painful for you.
I look forward to the day when public official's private lives have less of an impact on who gets elected. I start from the premise that many, many married people have sex with people other than their spouses. More men than women, perhaps, but women as well. And that when confronted with their conduct, most of those people will lie about it.
I'm not making a moral judgment. I'm not even asking whether the particulars about what John Edwards did, or what Eliot Spitzer did, or what Bill Clinton did, should disqualify them from holding public office. But I think we do have to ask this question: Should everyone who has had an extramarital affair and lied about it be disqualified from holding elective office? If it's that important, should be make every candidate take a polygraph, the way we know make them disclose their tax returns? Or is it only people who have affairs, lie about them and then get caught that we think shouldn't get elected?
How important should this be in deciding who is going to lead our country, when compared with other factors?
You people just don't get it. John Edwards, the slick talking ambulance chaser, gets on his soap box about needy people and helping them. Who the hell is going to argue with that! He made millions running his mouth, duh! He screwed the voters of NC into electing him and then did absolutely nothing for the state. His ego got the best of him. And thank God he got caught before he screwed the country. Hopefully, we will not hear from him again, ever!
There are two parts that bother me most about John.
1-He cheated on his Wife. I realize she can forgive him and take him back. That's her choice. I don't like Men who cheat on their Wives, especially when they're going through cancer treatments. How low can you go. And I'm a man.
2-What if he did get the Presidental nomination? After Kucinich was pretty much forced to drop out, I looked at Edwards as my next possible choice. I wasn't completely sold before he dropped out of the race, but I probably would've leaned towards him. If he was nominated, you better bet that the Republicans were holding onto that story until after the DNC, when they could really destroy him, his chances, our chances, and the party.
I realize he's done some wonderful things for those without a voice, and I hope he continues on that path. Eventually, I'll get past this. But I'm disappointed.
Wendy, this was a wonderful column. I, too, was devastated when this news finally broke, but mostly for Elizabeth and their children - they deserved better despite what many may think or say.
It doesn't surprise me that the National Enquirer appears to have put a lot of work into uncovering this story. I remember reading several articles about how the GOP feared Edwards the most out of all of the Democratic candidates. They understood that if his populist message started to resonate that he posed a real threat to their capitalistic, unregulated ways.
I believe that a person's personal transgressions in no way determine how they would lead or govern. The anti-intel
We need John and Elizabeth Edwards at the forefront of our fight against poverty; we need their strong and intelligent voices speaking out against the inhumanity of our healthcare system, but mostly we need to get over that which was none of our business in the first place.
If there's one thing that the Dems could learn from the Republicans, it would be how to circle the wagons and protect your own. I look forward to the Edwards' return to the national stage - it can't happen soon enough.
I am curious about your statement "a person's personal transgressions in no way determine how they would lead or govern" Crimes are personal transgressions and criminal records are carried for life! Personal transgressions also reveal a persons character and moral make up. How can they not be relevant to someones ability to lead or govern? They are facts that go directly to their judgment and decision making abilities.
I certainly don't equate personal transgressions with criminal acts. This is a personal matter between he and Elizabeth, it no way reflects on his ability to govern.
And, who are we to judge morality - I certainly don't want to be the moral barometer of this country. We've become an intrusive, nosey society. Many presidents had affairs either before or during their presidency, I believe history judged them based on their ability to govern.
I'm not excusing Edward's behavior, I'm simply saying that our presidential vote should be based on something more concrete than whether a person was unfaithful to his partner. It appears that we abhor this mentality from the "right", but seem not to recognize it in ourselves.
In shunning John Edwards, we do a disservice to the Progressive movement and stifle one of poverty's strongest champions, which is just what the GOP hoped we'd do.
Your reasoning is flawed. Go read the "Lord's prayer" it say in part:
"Forgive us our transgressions, as we forgive those who transgress against us."
moreupnorth:
I disagree! When it comes to sexual transgressions I have sen no evidence that it has any bearing on the way people govern. We still revere Thomas Jefferson, though there is ample evidence that he had sexual relations with a slave mistress. There are also stories of illicit affairs by FDR, Eisenhower and of course JFK. I think Bill Clinton was a more effective and competent President than either Bush Sr. or Bush Jr. No one ever accused President Nixon of illicit sexual affairs but that does not mean that he was an honorable President in the context of how he governed. Finally. if, as you claim, "Personal transgressions reveal a personal character and moral make up..." then John McCain, who had affairs while he was still married, should not not be loudly praised as an honorable man, and a hero. Much more importantly, he should not be elected president because of his documented marital transgressions. I am sure Republicans would beg to differ.
see FDR, JFK, MLK, RFK...
and GWB is the faithful one...
marital fidelity seems to have little correlation with how well a person can lead...
John Edwards is a human being. We all have flaws, we all screw up, and most of us will lie if the stakes are high enough. He took the democrats to the left and he gave a voice to the poor. For that I, at least am eternally grateful, no matter what the outcome.
I feel deeply ashamed that I EVER supported John Edwards. I went to Hillary after he dropped out and am angry with myself that I had bought into the old sick and distorted stereotypes of who HRC was.
My blind support of John Edwards kept me away from the person who really deserved my admiration and respect ... Hillary
He will never be forgiven. Lets hope that he can forgive himself.
Have you forgiven Bill?
nice...
Good point or how she treated Barack Obama during the campaign. Making a case that the DNC rules that she agreed to were unfair after the fact and fighting tooth and nail to convince all that she was right. I have forgiven her though I know what she did was wrong and harmful to the democrats. Even though she lost a fair amount of my respect because of the way she behaved definitely would have voted for her if she had won. Putting this country in good hands is the most important issue right now. We need a very competent president and vice president. It is tremendously sad what happened to the Edwards. I hope time will heal all and they will be able to continue their good work though I certainly am mad that Edwards decided to run knowing that his affair might be leaked. I never supported him because I thought his first focus ought to be his sick wife but Elizabeth Edwards was obviously part of the team and she wanted him to run too
Obama-Biden 08
And if you cannot forgive John Edwards how can you vote for John McCain?
(read some of your comments listed in your profile)
If you cannot forgive any politician who has had an affair, that will severely limit your ability to vote in this country.
She cannot forgive him for endorsing Obama
I just made a post about this, but might not be available. Sorry. What might have been.
No offense but my decision on who to pick for president is specifically based on what is best for my country not who "deserves my admiration and respect". Seriously.
JFK and FDR both cheated on their wives. So did John Edwards. Guess who didn't? George W. Bush. Out of the four, who has hurt this nation the most with their actions in office? Hint..it's not FDR, JFK or John Edwards.
John who?
I too was an Edwards supporter, and was dissappointed, but we ALL lie when we are trying to CYA. No one always tells the truth. This is something between him and Elizabeth. We just need to move on and get over ourselves.
"get over ourselves"? I'm fine with myself, it's John Edwards I've got a problem with. I've also got a problem with all of the childish male politicians that can't keep their pants zipped up. As someone else said, did these men learn nothing from Gary Hart?
I was an early supporter and contributor to Edwards, and I totally regret it. My sympathy lies with Elizabeth and the children, Wendy and all of his staff and supporters. As for John Edwards, grow the hell up. I'm so sick of you guys.
Thank you for this. Brings me a little closure. Like some of the other commenters, my initial response was extreme disappointment, then anger. How could he do this to us? More importantly and to echo your sentiment, who will be the flag bearer for the poor now? More than the disappointment I feel for a flawed individual, I feel such sadness that the working poor have lost an important voice. Not just John's, but Elizabeth's as well.
I hope you feel better having vented..I feel your pain. Now leave them alone for now, as we have someone we need to get elected for the sake of the poor and the rest of us. The reminder of those forgotten (and there are many of all sorts) is welcome but let's put our anguish on hold for about 6 weeks, and get to work-please.
I supported John Edwards. He was the first politicain I had ever donated to. I cried my heart out when he stepped. down. I for the most part have stopped feeling anger every day as I did when he finally admitted the truth. Oddly when I do think about him, I am more angry now, how dare he take donations and risk what he did. I feel badly for all the people who worked for him, I feel badly for all the voters who belived in him. I feel so awful for Elizabeth, with all she has to deal with this is to much. It can't be good for her health to have to deal with this. For all the people on who's behalf he spoke I am angry because he has lost credibilty they have lost . The only thing I am thankful for is that he didnt win the nomination.
I'm with you except for the Elizabeth part. If indeed she knew about this before Edwards threw his hat in the ring, she was complicit in exposing the Democratic party to the danger of the power of this information. I'm sure she is a lovely person, but to acquiesce to this rolling of the dice, with the lives of said disadvantaged at stake, was irresponsible.
I sat next to David Bonier at the Dem convention in Denver when he was interviewed by Andrea Mitchell. He was still very angry at Edwards and said he hasn't talked to him. Said people put their time, money and reputations on the line and they were betrayed. After the interview, I said to him that the thing that most saddens me about Edwards is that he killed Hillary. If Edwards wasn't in Iowa, HRC would be our nominee. David said he didn't know that; but he said that it would have been a different race. The arrogance of it all.
I trust we'll do fine; I pray we prevail. And I'm sorry, but John Edwards is yesterday's news-- and Sarah Palin is about to be.
I miss Elizabeth!!!!!
You're too kind -- with all the empathy in the world for her severe health issues, she was his enabler and should have known better!
Aren't you over-reacting a bit, Ms. Button? Most men have affairs, and probably 100% of wealthy men have affairs. If you didn't know that, you're rather naive.
Personally, I don't care a lick how many affairs Edwards had. He needed to be more discreet, for sure, but I think he would have made a good president.
i agree with darcy. I was an Edwards supporter and very sad to hear about his affair and even more so about its exposure, but your post made me look around for the violins. You sure piled in on, kinda like a tabloid, in talking about the poor poor lil child on its birthday. Please weep for the children of Newt G, John McC, Rudy G., Eliot S., and the giant horde of mostly Republicans who messed up the family story. Rich people and celebrities, not to mention everyone else, have been doing this forever without being deposed, overthrown, or put in the stocks. The "mistress" and "love child' (ie daughter) of French president Mitterand stood alongside the legal wife and children at the man's funeral. As the French know, a person's private life—within reason—has nothing to do with their ability to govern. Even Strom Thurmond's daughter, product of a much worse episode, finally got her day in the sun. And politicians DO live in a bubble of feelings of invincibility. Your post needed an editor, imho.
You must be logged in to comment. Log in or connect with
