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Will Durst

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Trickle-Up Economics

Posted: 09/23/2011 2:32 pm

It's all a dance, really. A Democratic president summons the gumption to call for higher taxes on the rich and Republicans cry like third graders having their ice cream taken away and given to the neighbor's dog. Invoking the hoariest of chestnuts; that oldie but goodie; as predictable as mushy green grapes in a fruit salad: The Class War Boogie.

For some reason, it's always a war with these guys. The War on Christmas. Culture Wars. War on Terror. The Crusades. Then they accuse Democrats of being emotionally unequipped for battle. Well, which is it? You can't have it both ways. Actually, you can. It just makes choosing which one to cruelly abandon to the wolves of winter that much more difficult. Or not.

When taxes are raised on the rich, that's class warfare, but when subsidies are handed out to giant corporations who siphon jobs offshore so that rich people can have more money, that's Trickle-Down Economics. What Barack should do is rename his efforts to balance the playing field, "Trickle- Up Economics." That would at least confuse them. Although after watching the last couple of debates, confusion does not seem to be in short supply.

We're not even allowed to call them rich anymore. They're "job creators" now. And yes, jobs are being created. In Mexico. And Vietnam. And China. The American Dream is alive and well, just not here. It's our own damn fault, really. American workers have ruined everything with their irrational demands for safe working conditions and a living wage. Who do we think we are? Stockholders?

Republicans have been as strident as a looped siren in a stainless steel silo in their opposition to a specific Obama proposal called the Buffett Rule, which calls for billionaires like Warren Buffett to pay the same tax rate as their secretaries. The GOP prefers the Jimmy Buffett Rule, which postulates that anybody worried about next month's rent money- start drinking Margaritas until they pass out.

You know what, they're right. It is a class war. The rich started it and their side is winning. They've bombed the middle class into submission burying jobs and pensions, playing chicken at the precipice with default to protect their precious aristocracy from paying one puny penny more in taxes. Cheap. Cheap. Cheap.

40% of all income gains in the last decade have trickled up to the wealthiest 1%. The richest 400 families in this country control more money than the bottom 150 million people put together. We're moving from Depression levels of income inequality into French Revolution territory. Isn't that Madame LaFarge over there in the corner knitting?

What is it with the rich? How much money do they need? How many cars can one person drive? How many beluga caviar cream cheese canapés can they consume at a single cocktail party? How many silk pajamas with platinum threads can you spill your Dom Perignon White Gold Mimosa on at a time? Okay, three. That's what Hilda is for. One of the things.

And these are the people complaining about a class war? You want rules, how bout the Rolex Tourbillon Rule? Mandating that any job creator wearing a watch worth more than a house who ever mentions class warfare, gets a hose shoved down his throat and goose liver pumped in until pate leaks from their ears. Less war-like. More food-fighty.


The New York Times says Emmy-nominated comedian and writer Will Durst "is quite possibly the best political satirist working in the country today." Check out the website: willdurst.com to find out more about upcoming stand- up performances or to buy his book, "The All American Sport of Bipartisan Bashing."

 

Follow Will Durst on Twitter: www.twitter.com/willdurst

 
 
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
JohnJudy
09:52 AM on 09/29/2011
I oppose higher taxes on the rich because if a gold meteorite falls into my yard I could be rich! Sorry. Gotta think ahead.
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HUFFPOST COMMUNITY MODERATOR
tacevad
American SS Card Carrying Socialist
06:07 PM on 09/28/2011
there is Always a glimpse of truth in comedy and Mr Durst has spotted one here.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
whyus
San Francisco native
07:26 PM on 09/26/2011
Funny! Amazing how satirical humor is right next to truth. But, in fact, you were stating the obvious which is funny and scary at the same time.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
masreality
Author of "Misconceptions and realities of life"
08:06 PM on 09/25/2011
In the midst of the political turmoil and storms of instability, there comes a mighty hurriCane off the coast of Florida. With the magnitude of this incident it is eminent that the republican party needs to dismantle its base, get rid of the tea party association and regroup. When this process is complete it will be time to start campaigning for 2016.
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
inmyhumbleopinion
Vote third party.
07:08 PM on 09/25/2011
"Who do we think we are? Stockholders?"

Don't know whether to laugh or cry.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Remember Remember
the fifth of November...
01:04 PM on 09/25/2011
if we're nearing french revolution times, does that mean we get to pull out the guillotines? (sponsored by schick and gillette, think of all the ad revenues!)
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Roxee
"Feeling" you're right, doesn't "prove" you are.
12:42 PM on 09/25/2011
When inequality rises and the working class lose their jobs, or don't get paid enough to live with dignity, animosity rises and rebellion ensues. This is not conjecture, history shows this happens every time. Is that what is in store for us?
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
gleitz05
Old people are allowed to be cranky.
02:26 PM on 09/25/2011
No, it's what's in store for the GOTP. And they brought it on themselves.
11:43 AM on 09/25/2011
Bravo Mr. Durst!

As Benjamin DeCasseres wrote, "Progress is nothing but the victory of laughter over dogma."

Maybe we can think twice when hearing their schtick & then ... just ... laugh.
08:52 AM on 09/25/2011
No one works for a poor boss. Including Mr. Durst. Indeed Mr. Durst is working for several corporations one might surmise. So why are Mr. Durst and the rest of the far left professional pontification paraders marching up and down to a rousing chorus of "Hate the Rich" to the tune of the Culture War Boogie"?

Answer: It's all they have got!

If they can not get the focus off of the economic fiasco wrought by this administrations misguided policies. Off of their blatant Crony Capitalist scandals and their inability to come up with one real fresh idea that does not involve "hating" "taxing " "demonizing" or "demagogiing" the evil rich while attempting to confuse small business people who show income of over $200K with billionaires that take tens of millions thru Capital Gains!

The Parade can not stop. Rain, shine, failure or not! Still the disingenuous Mr. Durst is coming up with is not stirring nor is it catchy. It is stale, off tempo and comical. Sadly, many corporations will likely wilt and fade away due to the economic realities of today. Mainly because no one is buying the hate, lies and distortions now matter how loud or melodic they are sung!!!!
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
santacruzbluz
Just passin' thru...
11:09 AM on 09/25/2011
Actually, out here in the real world, very few people work for rich folks. If you are a carpenter, and still have a job, more than likely you are working for another carpenter who isn't making a whole lot more than the guys he employs. This nonsense about no one working for a poor man comes from people who need to get out and see how this country really lives. They may also find out that "small businesses" and "the wealthy" are two different things. That's another erroneous talking point you hear a lot. Most small business owners are not wealthy, and most of the wealthy are not small business owners, and actually own no business at all. Very few wealthy people actually create any real jobs.
12:34 PM on 09/25/2011
"Actually, out here in the real world" 70% of people are employed by small business owners who are Sub Chapter S and LLC's. The income side of these entities does not truly reflect their take home. Much which is counted as income are expenditures that can not be itemized, depreciated or deferred. That my friend is gospel. What you describe exists but is to a great extent is the "underground economy". Sole proprietorships are a rarity due to the tax hazards. Welcome to the REAL WORLD. Now go hire your CPA and glue your rear to the federal grind stone with the rest of us waiting for 2012!
11:36 AM on 09/25/2011
Why do theseTP types mistake their regurgitated Fox/Rush/Beck blather for insight? Answer: It's "all they have got".
12:26 PM on 09/25/2011
In reality I have hope for real change. Faith in the entrepreneurial spirit and am proof of the potential for success that this nation can afford. I rely on my critical thinking and rhetorical education which pre dates all of the above. Lull yourself into all the false security you want but the failure of progressive socialism will spur a political backlash and legislative and federalist reversal like nothing seen for 170 years!
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
alafonse
It's definitely a crap-shoot.
11:11 PM on 09/24/2011
Class warfare? The rich have played the tax game before, they just whine like they've never heard of it.

If taxes go up on the rich, they'll handle this with aplomb: cut their company income and plow that money back into the company instead. They won't end up losing a dime, and the company will probably do better than ever, because they didn't siphon as much off in income.

The rich might actually end up HELPING our economy in the long run if they had higher taxes.
Isn't that nicely ironic?
11:18 AM on 09/25/2011
The rich are a funny breed. They hate taxes so much, they'll throw their money away to avoid paying them. You know what happens when you tax a rich person? They find ways to not pay it. As a result charitable giving increases, speculative investing goes up, company reinvestment increases and people get hired.
11:37 AM on 09/25/2011
"But when the taxman comes to the door, the house looks like a rummage sale".
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
dec7540
09:16 PM on 09/24/2011
I have heard this asked many times but never have I heard an answer from a progressive. How much of one's earnings do you think the government is entitled? How much wealth is too much wealth for an American citizen? Who determines the appropriate answers to the former questions in your mind? What does private property mean to a progressive? Should there be such a thing as private property in a progressive society?
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RacerX
E pluribus unum
01:03 AM on 09/25/2011
The rates should be set so that the gains are shared across the country - this stopped happening in 1980 go back to those rates - adjust as necessary. Check out the chart from 1947 to 1979. That or something close to it seems fair to me.

http://acivilamericandebate.wordpress.com/2011/04/10/the-30-year-growth-of-income-inequality/
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
dec7540
08:41 PM on 09/25/2011
also a curious answer..how is it that gains should be shared when there is unequal sharing of risk? Is that fair or just in your mind? Also, why focus on the period since 1980. Why not look at federal tax rates since say 1800?
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RacerX
E pluribus unum
01:05 AM on 09/25/2011
Don't forget you can look at it this way as well: Who determined the rates were unfair and needed to be changed in 1980?
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
dec7540
08:35 PM on 09/25/2011
again a non answer..it's a simple question. Not trying to be clever just curious where a single progressive believes Government's taxing power ceases and becomes confiscatory or unjust.
02:59 PM on 09/24/2011
To show how bad things are, we have the middle class that is unemployed mad at the middle class that is working. You can get that feeling by reading some of the posting on Huffpost.

The real class warfare story is the job proposal to allow the unemployed to work for free to give the employer the opportunity to test the worker out.

Lets assume that you are working for this employer making $10 an hour. The employer bring on several unemployed workers on for free.

What just happen to the value of your labor? It is not $10 anymore and hopefully not $0.
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angryoldman
No1 told me when 2 run I missed the starting gun
01:54 PM on 09/24/2011
The ultra-rich don't give a damn about you, or me , or this country. They live in the rarefied upper stratosphere of the " I'm so rich I can live on a boat in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean with no allegiance to anything and anyone but myself" club. The rest of the people of the United States can go take a long walk off a short pier for all they care.
02:32 PM on 09/24/2011
... a point of view that is 100% supported by REPUBLICANS, who will do anything, ANYTHING, to preserve the status quo for their rich patrons. "Job creators".... what a total joke, a complete insult to the intelligence of Americans. The Republican Party, to use a phrase coined by one of their heroes, is destined for "the ash heap of history". Years from now, Americans will shake their heads in disbelief that anyone was taken in by the current ideas, rhetoric, and policies of the Republican party.
07:35 AM on 09/25/2011
Pull up your big boy pants already.

What makes you think a complete stranger should pay for ANYTHING you get?

The use of tax receipts should be limited to ONLY those things that benefit society. Items like hair extensions, "nail art" and chrome wheels on your truck do not qualify as a societal gain.
12:36 PM on 09/26/2011
And the multi-million dollar jets, hundred thousand dollar foreign cars, and multi-million dollar mansions that the owners spend almost no time in, that are written off as business expenditures each year by all the CEOs should? At this point the only "societal gain" we could really get from anyone is creating more domestic jobs, and I don't see any of the super rich doing that, do you? And I agree, nobody should pay for anything that I get, and by that logic, all of the super rich that are skirting through the tax loopholes should not get to use the roads and infrastructure that are being created and repaired using the money that I pay each year, and yet they still do.
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camelias and sweet tea
Small drinking village with a shrimping problem
01:44 PM on 09/24/2011
One of the ways we can stop this crappola is to stop voting against ourselves every election.
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camelias and sweet tea
Small drinking village with a shrimping problem
01:43 PM on 09/24/2011
Somehow I just cannot feel sorry for the rich. And feel sorry for uncertainty. What uncertainty? did they just notice that the chauffeur's little girl looks like their wife? They are not the big job creators and are not afraid of things, they can go count their money and gold and get over it.