None Of Area Man's Friends Have Ever Seen Him With Shirt On 11/14/2009 05:12 am ET | Updated May 25, 2011 The Onion The Onion WHEELING, WV—Saying they don't know why it never occurred to them before, friends of local man Paul Helton told reporters Sunday that they... Read more on The Onion More: Wheeling FOLLOW COMEDY facebook twitter Suggest a correction GET THE NEWSLETTER Enter your email address to get top stories and blog posts emailed to you each day. FOLLOW HUFFPOST HuffPost Comedy HuffPost Comedy HuffingtonPost Available on the App Store Android App on Google Play Get it at Blackberry App World HUFFPOST NEWSLETTERS Enter your email address to get top stories and blog posts emailed to you each day. Get top stories and blog posts emailed to me each day. Newsletters may offer personalized content or advertisements. Learn More.