Everybody knows the Iowa caucus is the first major event of each party's presidential nomination process. Everybody knows the results often determine which candidates remain in the race and which ones will carpool with Dennis Kucinich back to Washington. But nobody really knows exactly how the Iowa caucus works. Do Iowans count up ballots to choose a candidate like most civilized states? No. Do they have some sort of electoral college system? Not really. Are the voting procedures similar to those portrayed in the adult film classic "Iowa Cock-us"? Sort of. Is there really an adult film called "Iowa Cock-us"? There oughta be.
Apparently, even some Iowans are confused as to how their own crazy system works. 23/6 obtained a memo, sent earlier this week by the Iowa Elections Board to each of the state's 1784 precincts. Follow these guidelines, and your precinct's caucus will be well on its way toward nominating top tier candidates like Walter Mondale and Edmund Muskie.