07/23/2009 05:12 am ET Updated May 25, 2011

Dickipedia: Heidi And Spencer Pratt

Heidi and Spencer Pratt (married April 25, 2009) are a couple of publicity whores, famous for tabloid feuding with even more idiotic publicity whores. That, and getting dropped off in some jungle somewhere (along with two of the Baldwin brothers and Lou Diamond Phillips). Oh right, and they're dicks.

Heidi and Spencer--or "Speidi," as they are sometimes called--are not especially charismatic or good looking, and possess absolutely no special skills, unless you consider applying lip gloss a special skill.

Of course, they did successfully weasel their way into the world of rich, young, immaculately-tweezed socialites, which definitely takes a measure of finesse. Heidi and Spencer have also made an art out of publicly befriending then publicly defriending then publicly refriending then publicly re-defriending (and so on) other brainless residents of Orange County, California.

Of Heidi and Spencer, Spencer is the cute one, Heidi the talented one. It's hard to say which is more insulting to whom.

Read more on Dickipedia