12/01/2009 05:12 am ET Updated 5 days ago

The Daily Show On High-Frequency Trading: "Douchey Traders Are Being Replaced By Douchey Computers" (VIDEO)

Samantha Bee of The Daily Show recently unearthed a new money-making scheme for some small scale investors: high-frequency trading. Up until now, Bee reports, high-frequency trading was only available to big-time investors and banks. Hence, this New York Times story from earlier this year.

Not quite sure how it works? Here's Bee's explanation.

"When they [computers] see that investors want to buy up all the stock, they buy up all the available shares and sell them at higher prices, most likely to other middlemen, who in turn sells those shares to investors.


Got that? Bee clarifies high-frequency trading with a question: "So Douchey Traders Are Being Replaced By Douchey Computers?"

For now, computers are getting away with this version of insider trading. That means that it's time to pull out your copy of Beginning Programming for Dummies, before regulators catch on.


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