06/21/2010 12:26 pm ET Updated May 25, 2011

Rahm Emanuel Leaving The White House: Sooner Or Later, Maybe Or Not!

So, okay, let's talk about the whole "Rahm Emanuel is going to quit in six or eight months" thing. Everyone who covers the White House is behaving as if they dropped half a tab of Ecstasy today in the wake of a London Telegraph story that reports Emanuel is mulling a departure from the White House after the midterm elections.

If you watched Emanuel in person, on ABC's "This Week", you wouldn't have caught a whiff of this. But the Telegraph amasses an impressive array of sources. Let's meet them, shall we?

--"Washington insiders"
--"a leading Democratic consultant in Washington"
--"An official from the Bill Clinton era"
--"another former Clinton official"

The Washington Post's Jonathan Capehart seems to think that the clearest sign of Emanuel's imminent departure is that his own chief of staff, Sarah Feinberg, left the White House to run "Bloomberg LP's Washington communications shop." His source for that, by the way, is at least as impressive as anything the Telegraph drummed up: "one of those "real" Americans I was talking to over the weekend." O-kay!

So, basically, this comes down to two roads of speculation, dividing in a forest of anonymous sourcery.

Rahm's leaving! And it makes total sense! After all, he's spent most of his White House tenure jumping up and down on the heads of constituents and activists that make up President Barack Obama's traditional base. At some point, Obama will need those people to very enthusiastically support his re-election and raise his money and staff his phone banks, and that will be slightly harder if his right-hand man is a guy who's been dedicated to treating them all like useless losers. Maybe he will become mayor of Chicago, or something! Also: White House chiefs of staff come and go all the time.

Rahm's staying! And this was all just a hearty piece of catnip-bait for the media, who'd love nothing more than to speculate as to who will be America's Next Top Senior White House Official Speaking On Condition of Anonymity.

Would you like me to make a prediction? No problem! I predict that this issue will continue to have no measurable impact on your lives, unless you are addicted to White House gossip -- which basically excludes all "real Americans," Jonathan Capehart's weekend companion notwithstanding.

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