After gracing the cover of tabloid after tabloid all these years, it's about time Jennifer Aniston adopted SOMETHING from Africa. It's practically a rite of passage! She may not have gotten Brad, but Jen definitely pwns Angelina's adoption efforts by adopting not just some measly child, but a fully-grown 33-year old man to be her boyfriend. As The Onion News Network reports, Jen and her new beau already look like a family. Never mind that he already has a wife and kids in Africa. Jen isn't going to let anyone get in the way of her happiness.