Who'd have thought Marlins outfielders Logan Morrison and Bryan Petersen sat around after spring workouts worrying about Justin Bieber?
But thanks to the delightful 7-episode Petey and LoMo Show on SB Nation, how two grown MLB stars wound up covering The Bieb's "Never Say Never" is fully revealed in witty banter and earnest desire -- the ernest desire to get the world's foremost tween star to finally love baseball.
"My thing is, he always does sports sh*t with basketball, hockey, freakin' every major sport but baseball. We've gotta get him into baseball," says LoMo, suggesting the pair serenade their way into the heart of a teenaged boy.
"That would never happen," Petey responds, setting his Spring Training roommate up for the closer: "Never say never."
And so they don't. The hilarious pair are shown ironing Beiber t-shirts from Hot Topic, practicing their musical skills, recoiling in horror at the grown-up dance moves of Beliebers on YouTube ("That's a little too provocative!" "They're 10!"), memorizing lyrics, and debating the merits of adding a didgeridoo purchased in episode 2.
"You probably won't like it, but hopefully you'll appreciate the effort we gave and come to a baseball game," says LoMo to Bieber, wherever he is, before the pair finally launch into a full rendition of the song, complete with the Jaden Smith rap break.
How do they do? Well, fortunately, the Marlins' forays into music have set the bar pretty low -- but watch above to decide for yourself, and we'll all know for sure if one night soon the shrieks of teen girls rise above Little Havana.
Catch future episodes of The Petey and LoMo Show at SB Nation's YouTube channel. Here's what hijinks to expect as the season unfolds: