08/01/2012 02:12 pm ET

Colbert Announces Romney Horse Rafalca As Literal Running Mate (VIDEO)

Call Mitt Romney boring all you want, the bottom line is, he has a car elevator in his house. That may be a little heavy on the one-percent-iness, but it's anything but dull.

Romney also owns a horse. Horse owners are the most interesting people in the world. Some horses are so interesting they should run for Vice President. Mitt's steed is competing in an Olympic event so pompous your mouth feels stupid saying it, so a VP candidacy is not out of the question.

Like him or not, Romney is a snowflake so unique he gives Vermin Supreme a run for his money. Don't be surprised if he choses an equine as his running mate.

After a careful analysis of a report about how Romney's VP announcement could be affected by his wife Ann's horse Rafalca competing in dressage at the Olympics, Colbert concluded with 100 percent certainty that his horse IS Mitt's running mate.

Is it really such a bad idea? Nay. As Stephen points out, a certain other vice presidential candidate was about as qualified as Ann's pet: "Rafalca's female, also doesn't read newspapers, and has completed the same amount of terms as governor."

We anticipate the VP debate with fervor.