Did the movie Contagion freak your scat out? Me too. In fact, I was initially barred from seeing the movie because my friends weren’t sure I could handle it. You see, I have what logical people will recognize as a perfectly normal and healthy awareness of the cascading festival of germs on various surfaces. My friends view this as a hilarious eccentricity.
What my filthy, disgusting friends don’t seem to understand is that starting a global pandemic is as easy as one exceptionally diseased person sneezing on your hand, then you picking out an eye booger with that hand just before boarding a 747 to Tokyo. It’s science, people.