01/17/2013 10:39 am ET

Jennifer Aniston May Never Wind Up Pregnant And We Will All Have To Deal

There are three great questions the world over: “Why are we here?” “Is there life after death?” and “Is Jennifer Aniston pregnant?”

Full disclosure before I begin: I have never been a huge Jennifer Aniston fan. It has nothing to do with Brad Pitt or Angelina Jolie; I’m not one of those people who takes it super personally when vaguely explained romantic situations pertaining to celebrities occur (because I think that’s stupid). It’s not that I don’t think Aniston is a decent actress sometimes. She’s been both lucky and unlucky enough to have achieved extraordinary success via one longterm role, thus making that what she’s known for…forever. She’ll never get other roles or be taken seriously in other genres besides comedy as the quirky, needs-a-life-change ingenue whose hair will never not be golden blonde.

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