02/12/2013 09:50 am ET Updated Apr 14, 2013

Kwame Kilpatrick And Other Things Packed With Lard: A Very Paczki Day Corruption Tour

I have a rather peculiar pre-Ash Wednesday tradition. I like to take my imaginary confectionary friend, Paczki the paczek, on tours of Detroit. 

What? As a journalistic gimmick for covering Paczki Day, this beats standing outside Hamtramck bakeries to ask the peasants why they are lined up to purchase doughnuts at 6:00 AM. I know, I know, paczki aren't doughnuts. They are lard-based ethnic pastries that, sorry can't do it, paczki=doughnut. Deal with it.

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