05/30/2013 12:47 pm ET

‘I Can't Stop Sexting My Ex-Hubby! Am I Cheating?'

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Dear Abiola,

Is sexting cheating?

I am a 54-year-old woman married to my second husband for almost 14 years. Prior to this marriage, I played the field a few years. I was with my first husband almost six years before I left him and moved on.

For the past few years, I have been having a texting relationship with my ex-husband. A lot of it has involved sex. He was unfaithful, lied, did drugs and even hit me a couple of times but, I just can’t seem to stop myself from ”sexting” him. We also have made plans to meet up. I cared very, very deeply about this man and attributed some of his ”bad boy” behavior to the fact that he was only in his 20’s when we were married. I was eight years older. We had our great times together, and I have never felt I could love any man as much as I loved him. When our relationship was going well, we had a great amount of love for one another. But when it got bad, it got very bad.