06/19/2013 11:26 am ET Updated Jun 19, 2013

FYI: Your 'Sexual Prime' Is Whenever the Hell You Want It to Be


Hey ladies careening toward age 35 — it's important decision time! You can A.) hit your sexual peak, and, like a remotely programmable robot in a Blade Runner ripoff, suddenly become "switched on" like a sex-crazed lunatic unleashed upon decent society. Or you can B.) reject the still-repressive social and cultural expectations of how female desire should work, and enjoy a sexual prime whenever you are good and ready, when opportunity permits, or even ongoingly. Tough choices, gals.

You don't have to spend all day reading old Cosmo issues in your dentist's waiting room to know that conventional wisdom paints men as hot, horny and rarin' to go at 18, while women aren't at their sizzlin' sexual peak until their mid-30's. But what does that even mean? The universe is playing a cruel starcrossed genitals joke on us? Dudes are already sexually spent by the time they are old enough to drink? OMG Cougars r real?

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