07/11/2013 05:40 pm ET

Vito Fossella Denies The Media A Third Ring For Their New York Political Circus


The New York Observer's Colin Campbell made good use of the sudden return of Eliot Spitzer to the political limelight, corralling the would-be New York City comptroller with would-be New York City mayor Anthony Weiner in a cheeky piece titled "The Boxer Rebellion: Disgraced Duo Transforms the Election Cycle":

“So what craziness is going to happen next?” a Democratic operative asked Politicker Sunday night. “Is Ed Koch going to climb out of the grave and join the field for public advocate?”

Earlier that day, Eliot Spitzer had announced a comeback campaign for comptroller, sending the city’s political world, still reeling from Anthony Weiner’s mayoral bid, further into shock.

“This is a land of second chances.” Mr. Spitzer said early Monday morning during a round of television and radio interviews. “I think it is a land of forgiveness.”

At the moment, however, New York City’s electoral atmosphere feels more like a variety show.

Just to put a fine point on it, the article comes complete with an image of Weiner/Spitzer being jointly sworn in whilst in their skivvies.

This is all well and good, but everyone knows that the iron-clad rule is that it takes three to make a "trend piece." Two just doesn't cut it. So sometime after Campbell's piece got published, his Politicker colleague Ross Barkan reported on a radio interview with former Congressman Vito Fossella (R-N.Y.), who famously became embroiled in a career-wounding scandal after a wild night of drunk driving led to the revelation that he had fathered a child with a woman who was not his wife.

The trend-piece opportunity presented itself when Fossella was asked if he wanted to get in on some of this Weiner/Spitzer road-to-redemption action, but hopes were dashed when Fossella was all, "No thanks":

“I am always humbled by folks who have asked me to reconsider and run again,” Mr. Fossella told radio host Curtis Sliwa yesterday. “Who knows what tomorrow brings? But for now, I look at it that the people who matter most are in good shape, that I am at a point I need to be and frankly, very simply … I don’t have that desire to run right now.”

Ah, opportunity denied. I suppose that someone could ask face-slashing former State Sen. Hiram Monserrate next, but I hope not because that guy really is just a putrid bag of filth.

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