01/22/2014 09:09 am ET Updated Jan 25, 2014

The Homo Sapien Kitchen Tool Lets You Cook Like A Caveman

The Fancy

Technology haters, there's a new product on the market and it was made with you in mind. It's pretty much the antithesis of progress of any kind.

If you've ever found yourself shaking your fist at the fact that smart phones have taken over the world, the Homo Sapien Multi Purpose Kitchen Tool might be just what you need. This new kitchen tool will bring you back a few thousand years, to when times were simpler. Like don't-even-have-matches-to-start-a-fire simpler.

The Homo Sapien Tool lets you cook like a cave man would, with nothing more than a blunt object and sheer force. It's made out of sandstone, is designed in the shape of a peeled potato -- though it has an uncanny resemblance to a rock you'd find in your back yard -- and it's advertised to sharpen your knives, crush garlic and grind herbs in a pestle.

So if you've ever felt annoyed at how perfectly knives mince a clove of garlic, or if you just hate the idea of having to plug in your food processor, you can pick up the Homo Sapien Kitchen Tool for just $59.

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