05/21/2014 08:38 am ET Updated May 28, 2014

Wednesday's Morning Email: Tea Party Dealt Major Blow

You can now have booze delivered like takeout to your apartment. We sense a Domino’s partnership in the works. This is THE MORNING EMAIL for Wednesday, May 21, 2014.

The Scuttlebutt TOP STORIES

“Republicans’ hopes of taking back the Senate received a big boost in primary elections Tuesday, with Minority Leader Mitch McConnell (Ky.) easily winning and other candidates favored by the party establishment beating back tea party Georgia, Democrats were banking on Republicans nominating a candidate so far to the right that he or she would alienate suburban centrist voters. But the two contenders considered to have the broadest general-election viability — businessman David Perdue and Rep. Jack Kingston — advanced to a July 22 runoff, complicating Democrat Michelle Nunn’s path to victory.” Here are the five things we learned yesterday, as well as the front page of the Louisville Courier-Journal. [Story via WaPo, Image via Salon]

“China and Russia signed off on a huge gas deal worth as much as $400 billion Wednesday that heralds a pivot east for Russian business amid ongoing tensions with the West over Ukraine, though few details of the deal were made public.” Here’s why this is a diplomatic slap in the face for the U.S. And meanwhile, it appears all that talk of Russian troop withdrawal from Ukraine’s borders has not happened yet. Wish we could say we were surprised. [USA Today]

“More people may be visiting hospital emergency departments this year as health benefits from Obamacare went live, according to a survey of physicians published Wednesday.” About half of ER docs said they saw an uptick. Take a look at the overall numbers. [HuffPost]

STATESIDE: Where's The Beef?
See what area Obama is designating a national monument. This woman stabbed her three daughters to death. A massive bee swarm shut down sections of a highway. Over 1.8 million pounds of beef has been recalled for E. Coli fears. Should paid menstrual leave be a thing? Pennsylvania became the latest state to have its gay marriage ban thrown out in court. The White House is going to talk drone attacks on its own citizens today. This man hid in a teen’s closet for five days and came out to sexually assault her at night.

In scaring the children news, check out McDonald’s new happy meal mascot.

Over a third of South Sudan will soon be on the edge of starvation according to the U.N. A blast in Nigeria that killed 118 people has the earmarks of a Boko Haram assault. Ex-Egyptian president Hosni Mubarak was sentenced to three years in prison for embezzlement. Canada wants to store tons of nuclear waste right next to the Great Lakes. A man attacked first and second graders in China yesterday, stabbing eight of them. This map shows the worst places to work in the world, and the U.S. isn’t doing as well as it should.

In redneck wedding news, have you ever seen a cake with taxidermied squirrels on top?

BUY! SELL! BUY! All 'Bout Dat Money, Money
There is such a thing as the “Amazon of Booze.” There was another massive GM recall. This is what a copper boom (and bust) town looks like. Hold onto your Cheerios: climate change is about to make your favorite morning cereal more expensive. And see how far your paycheck goes in these cities.

In forget the hamster wheel news, rodents just need turntables.

SCOUTING REPORT: AAA Player Goes Mike Tyson on Teammate
Here’s a breakdown of what college quarterbacks are worth. Indians pitcher Corey Kluber got pelted during his latest in-game interview by his teammates -- wait and see if he cracks a smile. You should want all your pitchers to throw submarine-style. A Dodgers prospect need surgery after an AAA teammate bit off part of his ear in a dugout fight. And the Superbowl is heading to...

In gotta pay the rent news, this guy makes a living off of his backflipping skills.

CULTURE CATCH-UP: Rust and Marty, Part 2
“True Detective 2” wants Jessica Chastain for its lead. We’re dreaming of a skeevy Louisiana world where Arya Stark is the Marty to her Rust. Nineteen apparently is not enough for the Duggars, who consulted a fertility doctor about having baby #20. This “Girl Meets World” sneak peek has us beyond excited to see Cory and Topanga as parents. The author of the infamous 300 Sandwiches blog is engaged at sandwich #256. It took that many. Hey girl, Ryan Gosling is a director now. And the Coen brothers are rewriting a script for a film starring Tom Hanks and directed by Steven Speilberg. It doesn’t get any better than that.

In aerial fail news, this is what happens when a drone hits a mountain.

LIVIN’: Natural Highs, All Day Erryday
Here’s all the reasons being a third wheel isn’t THAT bad. This is your body “on anxiety.” Make sure you wipe down the ten dirtiest spots in your kitchen. This 600-pound woman left her house for the first time in seven years. The Wall Street Journal has a nifty guide to help you figure out if someone is lying to you over email or text. Flying is a one-way ticket to catching something. And you need to check out these ways to get high, naturally.

In telling it like it is news, this cat says what we’re all feeling about her owner’s incessesant playing of ”Let It Go.”

Jude Law wore the deepest V neck ever (excluding Andy Samberg’s). Micheal Jace of “The Shield” allegedly confessed to shooting his wife. You’ll never believe which celebrities got their starts in fast food commercials. And Channing Tatum called himself a “high-functioning alcoholic.”

In bottle opener news, here’s how to make do without one.


@nickthune: "The FBI confiscated my computer" is the new "dog ate my homework"

@BuzzFeedStorm: Large hail from a severe thunderstorm in Aurora, Illinois - @ABC7Chicago

@blakeshelton: Nervous as a dog shittin' peach seeds!!!

@lenadunham: We just wrapped the 36th episode of Girls. That's the most anythings I have ever anythinged.

@Brilliant_Ads: Interesting classified Advert in the Star

Forget the wedding kiss: wedding handshakes are apparently all the rage.

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