What follows is my best reconstruction of the events of a party that took place in 2003 on the campus of Wesleyan University, one of the most hipster colleges in America. It’s a good illustration of certain facets of hipster culture. It involves a minor brush with fame. My memory, like everyone else’s, is fallible, so some of my recollections are probably inaccurate. Corrections may be kindly addressed to Benjamin Winterhalter, The South Pole.