BLACK VOICES
09/10/2014 01:21 pm ET Updated Sep 10, 2014

#WhyIStayed And Left A Man Who Yelled At Me

Cliff Parnell via Getty Images

Not long ago I found myself in love with man who was brilliant, interesting, accomplished and 10 years older than me. I was infatuated with him. He was an unbelievably talented singer, dancer, actor and instrumentalist and I fell for him quickly and without abandon. But the warning signs came soon.

There were several early fights in the first few weeks, times in which he yelled and spoke at me in a way that I was startled by. I was alarmed but I didn’t feel physically threatened. In our first fight I told him, “my Dad doesn’t talk to me that way.” He replied, “if you act like an asshole I’m going to speak to you like an asshole.” And I had indeed acted like an asshole. The fight we were having that day was entirely my fault and because I felt responsible, when he yelled at me in a way that was clearly a warning sign, I let it slide.

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