Raymond "Big Al" Brownley was a man who knew what he liked -- and steered clear of what he didn't.
That much is clear from the 82-year-old Pittsburgh resident's humorous obituary, which lovingly lays bare Brownley's passions in life, which, in addition to his "adorable" grandchildren, included "four-letter words," "four-wheel drive pickup trucks," and the "Four Horsemen of liquor: Jack, Jim, Johnnie and Jose."
Known for his catchphrases, "Life is hard; but it's harder if you're stupid," and "Don't be a jackass," Brownley "despised canned cranberry sauce, wearing shorts, cigarette butts in his driveway, oatmeal, loud-mouth know-it-alls, Tabasco sauce, reality TV shows, and anything to do with the Kardashians.”
"He would be channel surfing, and he couldn't tell [the Kardashians] apart," Brownley's daughter, Jill, told The Huffington Post of her father's hatred of the family's reality show. "And it really didn't matter to him ... Because from behind he just assumed they were all the same person."
In addition, Brownley, described as both a "squirrel whisperer" and "the greatest Dad in the world," firmly believed Heinz ketchup was never an appropriate hot dog condiment and "took fashion advice from no one."
The obituary has clearly touched many beyond Brownley's family and friends, with commenters from across the country offering their condolences.
"I never knew Big Al, but this wonderful obituary makes me feel as if I did," reads one comment. "Condolences to his family and friends, from another person who doesn't like the Kardisians or Heniz [both sic] ketchup."
Another reads, "I came to read the obituary, obviously lovingly written by one who knew the man well. I'm sure he will be missed by those who knew and loved him."
Other notable excerpts from the touching remembrance include:
"He had a life-long ménage a trois with his homemade chili and Gas-X. ... And his famous holiday eggnog had enough whiskey to grow hair on your chest."
"Quite a teller of tales, Big Al's elaborate stories often were punctuated with the phrase, 'And that's when I kicked his ass.'"
"He also loved milk shakes, fried shrimp, the Steelers, the Playboy channel, Silky's Gentlemens Club, taking afternoon naps in his recliner, hanging out at the VFW, playing poker, eating jelly beans by the handful, and his hunting dogs."
Read Big Al's full obituary on Legacy.com via the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette.