WOMEN
10/13/2014 04:15 pm ET

A Powerful Open Letter From A Woman About To Have An Abortion

Jillian Lukiwski via Getty Images

A woman claiming to be pregnant has written an open letter to the "Little Thing" she'll never meet.

In a recent post on the Reddit forum TwoXChromosomes, an anonymous user shared her feelings about her upcoming abortion:

Little Thing:

I can feel you in there. I've got twice the appetite and half the energy. It breaks my heart that I don't feel the enchantment that I'm supposed to feel. I am both sorry and not sorry.

I am sorry that this is goodbye. I'm sad that I'll never get to meet you. You could have your father's eyes and my nose and we could make our own traditions, be a family. But, Little Thing, we will meet again. I promise that the next time I see that little blue plus, the next time you are in the same reality as me, I will be ready for you.

Little Thing, I want you to be happy. More than I want good things for myself, I want the best things for the future. That's why I can't be your mother right now. I am still growing myself. It wouldn't be fair to bring a new life into a world where I am still haunted by ghosts of the life I've lived. I want you to have all the things I didn't have when I was a child. I want you to be better than I ever was and more magnificent than I ever could be. I can't do to you what was done to me: Plant a seed made of love and spontaneity into a garden, and hope that it will grow on only dreams. Love and spontaneity are beautiful, but they have little merit. And while I have plenty of dreams to go around, dreams are not an effective enough tool for you to build a better tomorrow. I can't bring you here. Not like this.

I love you, Little Thing, and I wish the circumstances were different. I promise I will see you again, and next time, you can call me Mom.

-h

In response to the comments on her letter admiring her strength and thanking her for sharing her story, the anonymous user expressed her gratitude for the supportive feedback.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you," she posted. "It is hard. I feel sick and awful for not wanting something that, at the same time, I want so badly. But I feel better knowing I'm not alone and now that I see it all written out, there's less madness bumping around in my head, which is nice. Thank you, again."

This Reddit user is not alone in wanting to share her abortion story. Not Alone, a website founded by abortion activists, offers a space for women to share their own stories -- in the hope of de-stigmatizing abortion.

"We are here to let women who have had abortions know that they are part of a community," the website reads. "We are not ashamed of our experiences ... and we are not alone."

H/T Jezebel

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