COMEDY
10/28/2014 06:13 am ET Updated Oct 28, 2014

Jon Stewart Wants To Know Why Chris Christie Is 'Such A D*ck About Everything'

Jon Stewart's back, and he's taken "The Daily Show" to Austin, Texas. There his team of correspondents have been working hard to cover the Ebola story from every Texas angle possible.

Stewart started by asking Dallas Senior Health Correspondent Samantha Bee how the city managed to get Ebola-free.

"Dallas officials tried every Texas solution they could think of," reported Bee. "They shot at Ebola. They gave it the death penalty. They prayed for the virus."

But, as it turned out, "all they really needed to do was just get their shit together."

Now that Dallas no longer has active Ebola cases, the city can focus on a few other problems.

"While there's no more Ebola, Dallas is still a steaming concrete wasteland of traffic jams, stupid hair and big belt buckles," Bee said.

Next, Stewart brought the news back to the city the show just left, New York, which saw its first Ebola case last week. And in neighboring New Jersey, a nurse who returned from helping Ebola patients in Africa was put into quarantine, even though she doesn't have the disease.

That led Stewart to ask, "Why does [N.J. Gov. Chris] Christie have to be such a dick about everything?”

For more on Ebola and and Texas, check out the clip above. And for Ebola in New York and New Jersey -- and Stewart's takedown of Christie -- see the video below.

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