11/24/2014 10:53 am ET Updated Dec 06, 2017

Sh*t Parents Will Never, Ever Say

Parents of small children have a lot of stuff: plastic toys, endless homemade art projects, single socks, and of course, all the love in the world for their kids. What most of us don't have are things like time, energy and spontaneous movie nights. Nope, those are luxuries of the past.

Which is why there are some phrases that we used to say all the time that now seem somewhat comical. Let's all commiserate together, shall we?

Sh*t Parents Never Say

What'd we miss? Post your "I don't say that anymore" phrases in the comments!

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