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01/20/2015 01:58 pm ET Updated Dec 06, 2017

Why A Controlling Husband Says His Wife Should Be Submissive To Him (VIDEO)

Sarah and her husband of eight years, Jason, who is a pastor, admit that Jason has used the tracking device on Sarah's cell phone, has asked her to put the phone on speaker so he can hear her conversations, and always wants to know where she is going before she goes. “I’m fed up with the way that Jason treats me. I’ve been taught that I need to submit; submitting means Hubby is always right,” Sarah says. “I am tired of being controlled. I am ready to be my own person.”

Jason acknowledges that he has some questionable behavior. “I can be a jerk. I can be controlling and manipulative. I want to know what’s happening, when it’s happening, why it’s happening. There have been times I’ve been verbally abusive,” he says. He also says that he’s punched a wall out of anger and has pushed his wife out of the way to get to their bedroom. “I believe a wife is the weaker vessel, leaning on her husband, who’s supposed to be stronger, that’s just the way God made us.” Jason continues, “I want her to be her own person. It’s important that Sarah has an independent nature with a submissive characteristic … I believe the Bible says that husbands are to love their wives as Christ loved the church, and the Bible says that wives are to be submissive to their husbands.”

In the video above, Dr. Phil says to Jason, “You love your wife as Christ loved the church? I don’t think Christ was verbally abusive with the church. I don’t think Christ stomped around and slammed into the walls. That’s not loving your wife as Christ loved the church. And the submission followed from the love. And that is not what you’re talking about here. That is a perversion of the scripture, which is offensive to my sensibilities.”

Dr. Phil asks Jason, “You’re either wanting to have a Godly marriage or you’re wanting to run your own insecurities and your own agenda and use that to bolster your argument. You can’t have it both ways.”

“I believe that I’m supposed to set the example in the home,” he says, admitting that he’s not doing a great job.

Dr. Phil asks Jason about having used the tracking feature on his wife’s phone. “Do you consider that to be part of her submission to your will? Do you consider that to be part of your Godly right as a husband?” he asks.

“No, sir,” he says. “Why I act that way, I don’t know. But I know that I shouldn’t.”

On his show Tuesday, Dr. Phil addresses another issue the couple says is causing stress in their relationship: Sarah’s meddling parents. And on Wednesday, tensions rise when Jason’s parents join the conversation. See more from these episodes here.

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