How can it possibly be that time again already? The summer feels like it's just begun, and yet our Facebook feeds are filled with kids heading off to school, backpacks stuffed with new school supplies. Despite the excitement surrounding this time of year, there are a few very honest thoughts that many parents think as back-to-school season approaches.
1. Please Don't Ask for That Outfit.
This is particularly true for parents of little girls, though there are certainly trends that we wish boys would avoid, too. Here's the scenario: You've just walked into the kids' clothing section of your store of choice and your daughter gasps. She spies an outfit she NEEDS TO HAVE, MOM. It's atrocious. It's a glittery, cheetah-print mini skirt and matching top that says, "Diva in Training." It's not cute. You do not enjoy divas, neither in training, nor professionally speaking. You do not appreciate the neon animal print, and you definitely do not want your daughter walking out of the house in anything that short. Tell her that's "so last year" and steer her toward the tunics and leggings, ASAP.
2. What Is a Flair Pen?
There's something magical about shopping for school supplies, isn't there? Choosing the perfect backpack and lunch box, snagging the big package of colored pencils and grabbing the last composition book the store had in stock. But then there's always the random item on the list that makes you feel like you have no idea what you're doing. Case in point: Flair Pens. What is a flair pen? Is that some kind of calligraphy tool? Is that, like, a black pen with some kind of sticker on it? No, it turns out it's a BRAND. A specific brand. You're welcome.
3. I Love My Kids, but Hurrah! Activity Stress, Be Gone.
Now that summer's coming to a close, a wave of relief washes over you. You know, the one where you realize you no longer have to plan day trips, beg friends who have swimming pools for yet another playdate or come up with new responses to I'm booooooored. Of course, you love spending more time with the kids during the summer months, but let's be honest: Having them back in their classrooms is all kinds of awesome.
4. Please Get a Teacher Who Doesn't Believe in Homework.
Ah, the first parent-teacher conference. Meeting the teacher can be overwhelming, as their annual plan unfolds before you and a room of your peers, all seated in tiny chairs with copies of PowerPoint presentations before you. You size up the teacher. She seems capable and inspired. You begin your annual silent chant: Please let Miss Pendleton be one of those renegades who doesn't believe in homework and who only sends home positive notes and never emails me that my child seems to need some extra help. Oh, and also one who does not need a room mom or volunteerism of any real kind. No eye contact, please don't look at me.
5. Wait, Please Stop Growing Up.
Whether your little one is starting kindergarten, sixth grade or high school, or it's "just another year," this is a moment to realize that they're growing up. Admit it: You have that ugly-cry moment when they walk out the door on that first day of school, or get on that bus, or close your car door as you're dropping them off. That moment when you pause, reminisce about years gone by, think about how quickly they're growing up and would give anything to make time stand still for just a moment, just long enough for one final, embarrassing mom-hug. All we can do is just keep loving 'em. And remember, we're in this together.