02/11/2014 07:05 pm ET Updated Dec 06, 2017

Lessons from the Dog Park

Took my second trip to the dog park last weekend. Amazing place that dog park. Made me think the world would be a much easier place to navigate if we were able to judge someone's character simply by sniffing butts.


I'm not kidding. Seriously, even if you're not a dog person, go to a dog park and watch for a while. In less than a minute you'll be able to gauge who you'd want to hang with and who's just not worth your time.

I'll even go so far as to argue that the whole dog park culture would be great to implement during a job interview (or dating) process. You'd really nip a lot of issues in the bud.

Let's role play. You walk into a job interview with high hopes. You've read great things about the company. Their stock has consistently done well and it seems like an overall nice place to work. Then your potential boss comes in, sits down at the table. Instead of small talk and fumbling in your briefcase for your resume, you walk right over and stick your head in her butt (remember, we're role playing here)... I mean really give it a good sniff... Get in there. If she turns around and snarls at you, teeth glaring, you book it, don't look back. No second chances. This is not a place you want to work. Not for this woman. Not for this bitch (no pun intended).

See how easy that was? I just saved you six months and two trips to Kinkos.

You walk into the next place. Looks decent. Not necessarily your first choice in jobs but you're not one to turn down an interview. A guy walks in. Not the best-looking boss. A little rough around the edges. But you go in for the sniff. And to your surprise... no growl! In fact, he reciprocates and sniffs yours. Nice guy, huh? You walk around in a circle sniffing each other's butts and the next thing you know you're hosting the company holiday party at your house and sending his kids birthday presents!

Success! You didn't judge a book by its cover. You embraced your inner canine and got the answers you needed in less than thirty seconds. All because you did this:


Pardon me, can I have flex hours?

Humans. We're so... what's the word... tentative? Prudent? Guarded? Everything we do has to be so calculated. So planned. We dance around the issues. Waste time trying to figure people out. From spouses to jobs, moms on the playground to people on the bus. When all we really need to do is sniff their butts.

But dogs... they get to the point. No beating around the bush. No dilly-dallying. No judging from the carpool line. I like that. Going to try it sometime.

Just not exactly sure how to decipher this:


Must be a second interview.

Speaking of ass (as in kick)... I made some awesome, kick-ass chicken wings the other day for a little football gathering/soccer party. Made me look like I was the queen of sports food. Which I'm not.

But throw this in your crock pot and see what I mean.

Chinese Chicken Wings



  • One package chicken wings (16)
  • appx 1/2 cup soy sauce
  • appx 1/4 cup brown sugar
  • 4-5 splashes dry sherry (which isn't dry at all... it comes in a bottle)
  • 2-3 sprinkles ginger
  • 1-2 cloves minced garlic
  • pinch red pepper flakes (optional)
  • Directions:
  • Mix all ingredients
  • Put wings in crock pot on low
  • Add sauce
  • Cook for 5-8 hours