As we head into 2015, you can read list after list of resolutions you should make, advice you should take, and lessons you should carry with you into 2015. In fact, as we head into the new year, I have been making my own lists -- and given that my job involves interviewing top personal growth experts for their best wisdom, the inspired knowledge I've amassed for these lists is great.
But at the end of the day, I've come to see that there are five standouts from this year -- fundamental truths that will change your world if you let them. They've changed mine.
1. When people show who you who they are, believe them. We all create projections of the people in our lives through our kaleidoscope of experiences, hopes and vision for them. But when a person shows you who they are, it's your job to deconstruct the image you've created (bad or good), and trust that they are who they're showing you they are. Believe them even if you really, really don't want to -- even if you really, really wish they were actually who you projected them to be.
2. Like attracts like. This is the basic principal of the law of attraction and it is probably one of the most powerful tools you'll ever learn. From a quantum physics level, we're all just energetic beings attracting our vibrational energetic matches. So your thoughts and actions create a vibrational frequency that attracts that same vibration from the universe. Ever notice that when you wake up and stub your toe, then spill your coffee, then curse the world -- I'm having the worst day and everything and everyone sucks! -- that you then find yourself propelled into a chain of misfortune (the train is delayed, your cell phone charger has mysteriously fallen out of your purse, your babysitter didn't show up, etc.)? That's the law of attraction. When you're feeling down and crappy, you attract low vibration events in your life --the sucky day stuff. But when you're feeling happy and optimistic, you attract happiness and good things. It's seriously as simple as that. (It seems too good to be true, but it's not).
3. Set realistic expectations for others. In order to appreciate the people that deserve to be in your life and release those that don't, you have to set realistic expectations for others. If your brother will never be able to talk out a disagreement in a mature manner, figure out a way to get along and move forward without that kind of conflict resolution. If your friend doesn't have the capacity to sympathize with certain disappointments in your life, find another friend who does and talk to that friend instead. Setting realistic expectations allows you to actually enjoy the valuable gifts a person brings to your life and avoid the disappointment and frustration that comes when you expect people to give, do or be more than they can.
4. The world is full of wonderful, well-intentioned people. Look around and you'll see a sea of individuals much the same as you -- experiencing the same fundamental human condition -- vulnerabilities, strengths, weaknesses, failures, success, fun and grief. Though that guy may have cut you off in his car, or the woman at the front desk told you the wait was 15 minutes but it's been nearly an hour, their actions aren't personal vendettas against you. They're really just trying to get through the day as you are. When you shift your lens, you'll find a world full of kind, loving, generous people doing the best they can. You'll see the woman that says hello when she passes you on the street, the guy that helps you lift your luggage into the overhead compartment on the plane, the girl that let's you go in front of her in line at the grocery store when you're just buying milk. And you'll understand that the guy that cut you off is just freaked out he's late to pick up his daughter at school, and the woman at the front desk is just totally overwhelmed on her first day at a new job. See? Feels better already.
5. You get what you ask for. If you're sitting at a restaurant and you haven't ordered, you don't expect to get served, right? The same goes for everything in life. Ask your boss for a raise. Ask your friend to be there for you. Ask your son to help you set the table. This works for the universe, too -- you get what you ask for. So place your order for whatever you want. The only rule is to be specific. No order is too big (there's a reason you want it). Write it down. It works.
Alexis is hosting several free online interview series' with top personal growth and wellness experts next year to help you get the body, career, love -- the life! - you want. Click here to learn more -- next up is Borrowed Wisdom for a Better Body with leading health and wellness experts. Recordings of this winter's series, the Borrowed Wisdom World Summit, are available, too!