11/11/2014 03:09 pm ET Updated Jan 11, 2015

Mothers Everywhere, You Are Welcome

Alishia Osborn

This Sunday, I lowered expectations for mothers everywhere.

While many of us try to live up to the hype, I did us all a favor and lowered the bar.

I let my kids eat candy for breakfast, wash it down with a Dr. Pepper, and I even let one sleep in her dirty Halloween costume.

I did it for the people.

All the mom people.

'Cause while my ultimate goal of world peace lives far outside my scope of capabilities, my ability to make one mom feel like she is "the ultimate" is obtainable. If you cooked your child breakfast, a real breakfast, (which includes Eggo Waffles from a toaster in my book), then you are awesome.

My children fended for themselves today. They ate cereal for lunch, and some even ate it for dinner, too. And not the healthy kind. Oh, no. This was that sugar-covered crap that they name after fruit to make mothers who feed it to their kids for lunch and dinner feel better about themselves.

I did however, manage to put a load of laundry in the washer... and five hours later, it's still in the washer. I may be a rebel and leave it till tomorrow.

You never know.

I'm feelin' kinda crazy up in here tonight.