05/30/2012 06:44 pm ET Updated Dec 06, 2017

Best/Worst Brands of the Week: Gotye, Taps, Billy Squier, and the Side Ponytail

Who has Gotye’s “Somebody That I Used to Know” on an infinite loop? OK, I do. There is something very (The) Outfield about this song. No, no, it’s not on infinite loop because it takes me back to a field behind a private school in Baltimore where I had my first “kiss” with Richard B. It’s on infinite loop because it has so many hooks you are punctured, fall to the ground, and succumb unwillingly to it’s many unexpected sounds. It’s one of the greatest songs since 1985 and video is equally mesmerizing.


Doo-doo-dooo. Doo-doo-doooo. Doo-doo-doo. Doo-doo-doo. Doo-dodooooooooooooooooooooooo. “Taps.” There is nothing more American than this melody except Farrah Fawcett’s 1976 Sports Illustrated poster. Taps. It was written by Union Army Brigadier General Daniel Butterfield and was played to signify the soldiers’ work day complete until this important military guy, John Tidball, decided in 1862 that our enemies were too close to fire three volleys at the burial of a 2nd artillery soldier. They have played it ever since to conclude military funerals. Taps. Can we remember more the soldiers on this day and less how you enjoyed your grilled corn?

I did not mean it. Maybe it’s because I did the Landmark Forum this weekend and got in touch with my inner entertainer, but I did not plan to make this all about music so far. Perhaps I am feeling nostalgic this week and I wanted to honor the only thing that can truly connect me to my past -- music. I am constantly comforted in the empirical thought that the best music of all time happened between 1960-85.  DJ’s at the Electric Room play The Rolling Stones, still. Thirteen year-olds have Rush on their iPods and they make their DJ's play Led Zeppelin at their Bar Mitzvahs. What about Billy. Why Billy Squier did not get as much cross generational love beyond Jay-Z's Stroke remix is a mystery. Billy Squier lives today and you may have seen him tending 20 acres in Central Park as a dedicated member of the Central Park Conservancy. Billy: I am going to make you and the side ponytail popular again.

Did you know that Norwegians tending their acres were the ones that invented the loafer? They did. And now, more than the colorful Tory Burch loafer of yesteryear, these purist women in their 20s and 30s don the black or beige leather rad-trad (radically traditional) solid color Loafer or Slip-on.  From the feet down it’s all Jim from Accounting. From the feet up it’s Jane the Intern of Diane Von Furstenberg in the meatpacking district. I did the masculine Annie Hall-a uniform. Five different colors in oxford shirts and dress pants, multi-colored Windsor knots, and one pair of big spaceship shoes. I’d mix and match the shirts, pants, and ties, but could never give in to the flat male shoe. I think Jane the intern is onto something. Perhaps we can dominate without the heels. Let me get back to you on that.