08/26/2014 10:51 am ET Updated Dec 06, 2017

The Roller Coaster of the Infamous Two-Week Wait

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I had a very peculiar love-hate relationship with the two-week wait, and I know I am not the only one. In the beginning, the two-week wait can be really exciting. Anticipation makes everything so much more interesting, and waiting a decent amount of days to pee on a stick becomes exhilarating (who would've thought!) After a while of trying to get pregnant without any success, the two-week wait becomes a little annoying. It is that period of time in which scary thoughts creep into our minds; Is it me? Am I doing something wrong? I shouldn't have had that glass of wine at dinner, etc. etc.

Then things turn for the ugly. Our nature never lets us give up hope so we start the wait with enthusiasm. As days pass and we start feeling all kinds of "symptoms," we create this illusion in our heads and could swear we are pregnant. Then we realize the so called symptoms are all in our heads or even worse, they are premenstrual symptoms. Anger creeps in and we start sabotaging all our month-long efforts. Some women binge on junk food, others just stop their exercise routine and those who started out the cycle practicing meditation and other relaxation techniques begin to doubt themselves. A bunch of them are in denial, so they spend a good amount of money buying home pregnancy tests and taking them way too early on the cycle. They get their big fat negatives and disillusionment invades them. It gets to the point where you would just rather get your period already and start over.

We all go through a version of the two-week wait. From those who have been trying for three months to the ones who have tried for years and even those who are undergoing a certain kind of assisted reproductive process. We all take our own approach for surviving it. Mine changed from one month to another but these simple rules were pretty consistent and helped me cope with it. Hope it helps you too:

Rule #1: Step away from the sticks! No amount of pee will give you a positive result if it's too early in your cycle. If you are tracking your temperatures try to wait until you have eighteen high temps before peeing on a stick. If you are not tracking temps at least wait until your period is three days late.

Rule #2: Chill. This is the only time that the just relax" advice is helpful. Keep your mind busy in other things. I used to drop all my fertility related books and read something completely unrelated (Tabloids are a no-no, celebs are popping babies and you don't want any reminders). By now you did everything in your power to make it happen so just let it be. Note: The only two times I managed to do this were the ones I ended up with a big fat positive.

Rule #3: Stick to the plan. Like I said, there is a point when you just give up and start sabotaging your diet and lifestyle choices (choices you took to boost your fertility in the first place.) Don't! Stay strong and stick to your plan, even if in the end it turns out you are not pregnant, keeping your healthy choices will prevent you from having the horrible feeling it may have been your fault that implantation wasn't successful.

Rule #4: When all is said and done... If you are feeling anxious, frustrated or defeated, allow yourself to feel that way for 15 minutes and then move on. I used to take a "make the best of it" approach and plan an activity I wouldn't have been able to do if I had gotten pregnant like rock climbing or hiking, it really helped to do that rather than to sit at home and sulk.

Rule #5: Keep the faith. Remind yourself that with your period comes a new cycle and a new opportunity to try to achieve your dream. This cycle could be it!


This article was previously published in the Ovatemp Blog at