11/28/2009 08:48 am ET Updated May 25, 2011

White House Party Crashers Almost Started Nuclear War

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report) - The couple who crashed the state dinner at the White House earlier this week made their way to the Oval Office and came within seconds of triggering a nuclear war, Secret Service officials admitted today.

According to a Secret Service spokesperson, the uninvited couple managed to reach the unlocked Oval Office without supervision and began "drunk dialing" Russian President Dmitry Medvedev before they were nabbed.

"They should not have been in the Oval Office and should not have been on the red phone trying to start a nuclear war," said Carol Foyler, the Secret Service spokesperson. "On behalf of the entire Secret Service, let me say, 'My bad.'"

The Obama White House said it was exploring a number of alternatives to prevent party crashing from occurring in the future, such as instituting a so-called "public option" for state dinners that would allow uninvited members of the public to attend. More here.