Meeting a man you'd like to date and have a life-long relationship with sounds to some as difficult as pushing a pea uphill with your nose! When we interviewed women for Love For Grown-Ups: The Garter Brides' Guide to Marrying for Life When You've Already Got a Life, all of whom married Mr. Right after the age of thirty five, we heard some new ideas and best of all, new approaches to the usual way of looking.
1. Married Friends
Spread the word among your married friends. They know who is divorced, widowed and available. Wives know who of their husband's friends they can fix you up with which leads to...
2. Blind Dates
We think blind dates have gotten a bad rep. If someone wants to set you up, then by all means go. If it doesn't work, remember it's one evening out of you whole life. And we think blind dates are a plus. Two of the authors of our book met their husbands on blind dates.
Yes, find an activity where volunteering isn't a solo experience. You don't want to do one on one tutoring, but helping enroll someone in a special program is an idea. Find a cause which interests you and go see what you can do - and who you can meet!
Yes, go to any and all reunions. You don't know who you'll connect with. And even if you don't meet Mr. Right, you may find an old friend who knows just the right person for you.
5. Your Place of Worship
Join a committee at your church or temple. All their activities are run by congregants, so go help out.
6. Take Lessons in Something You've Always Wanted To Do
What are your interests? Want to learn to scuba dive? Learn Chinese cooking? Check out the classes offered at your local Y. One of our brides took flying lessons and married her flight instructor.
7. Dinner with a Girlfriend
You're meeting a friend (or friends) for dinner. Don't pick that "Salad and Iced Tea" place you always go to. Go to a steak-and-potatoes place where you'll be surrounded by men. And, get there a little early and have a drink at the bar.
8. Weddings and Parties
Say yes to every invitation you receive, and go alone. It's hard to walk into a room full of strangers alone, but if you're alone, it's likely someone will come up and talk to you. And maybe weddings put people in the mood to connect; several of our brides met their husbands at weddings.
9. The Work Place
Though a lot of people don't think this is the ideal place to meet someone, keep your eyes open. Not every man at work will be married!
10. Online Dating
Yes, either you've dreaded creating an online profile or your profile wasn't effective. Check out our piece on how to write an online profile.
Sometimes it just happens. You weren't planning anything special, but you met someone special. So don't say no to doing new things and keep yourself open to meeting people.
We always tell our readers "One date can change your life."
Ann Blumenthal Jacobs, Patricia Ryan Lampl and Tish Rabe are the authors of Love for Grown-ups: The Garter Brides' Guide to Marrying for Life When You've Already Got a Life, a relationship guide based on interviews with women who married over the age of 35. The book tells you how to find Mr. Right, marry and find life-long happiness. The Garter Brides are a sisterhood of women who all got married later in life. They offer tried and true advice on how to have the love and life you want.