When I was a kid, I loved the television show Let's Make a Deal. I especially loved the segment in which the host, Monty Hall, would ask a woman from the audience to find some obscure item in her purse, such as a paper clip or supermarket receipt. I've been thinking that parents could play a similar game, looking for obscure items in the family room. So, here's the game. Sit on the couch in your family room and see how many of the following items you can spot. Tally the points and leave a comment with your total. Good luck!
1. Juice, fruit, or ice cream stain on the couch... 10 points
2. Juice, fruit, or ice cream stain on the ceiling... 50 points
3. Artwork that you are dying to recycle but are not allowed to recycle and that you will recycle in seven months when your kid forgets about it... 20 points
4. Anything from a birthday goodie bag (e.g. Cheap plastic non-functioning harmonica; superball; plastic bracelet that was popular with Punky Brewster in 1985; plastic parachute guy who, if thrown into the air, will fall no more slowly than if thrown without parachute). Each item ... 10 points
5. Couch cushion fort... 20 points
6. Bare couch with no cushions (that you are sitting on)... 50 points
7. Electronic device that your child has taught you to operate... 10 points
8. Unfolded laundry in laundry basket... 5 points
9. Child in laundry basket... 20 points
10. Plastic set of Tinkertoys... 1 point
11. Classic wood Tinkertoys... 10 points
12. One lone mystery Tinkertoy, even thought as far as you know you don't own a set... 50 points
13. One lone Othello piece... 10 points
14. Abandoned Monoploy money, Risk piece, or six-sided die... 10 points/each
15. Doll head eerily rolling around on the floor... 25 points
16. Toy that your child out grew 5+ years ago... 10 points
17. Child-made paper mache anything (most likely pinata)... 25 points
18. Nail clipper on window sill... 15 points
19. Nail clipper and a small pile of nail clippings on window sill... 25 points
20. Undies (child)... 25 points
21. Undies (adult)... 0 points
22. Sippy cup or bendy straw... 10 points
23. Bendy straw in a glass of strawberry milk... 50 points
24. Balloon... 10 points
25. Helium balloon... 20 points
26. Helium balloon, mostly deflated, hovering at eye level that will scare the bejesus out of you at one in the morning because you think it's an intruder or the ghost or your grandpa... 50 points
27. Thomas the Tank Engine train tracks that you will step on at one in the morning after the balloon scares the bejesus out of you... 35 points
28. Tin of pens and pencils... 15 points
29. Tin of working pens and sharpened pencils... 50 points
30. Reach under sofa cushion. If you find:
a. Pen or pencil... 5 points
b. Coins totaling more than fifteen cents... 10 points
c. Game piece... 10 points
d. Hair, lint and used tissues... 25 points for bravery
31. Kid-related stain on your shirt or pants... 10 points
32. Stain-free, wrinkle-free clothes... -10 points for lying
BONUS: Fifty points if you've had sex on the couch this year, cause good for you.
Tally your score and write the total in a comment. Good luck!