Between Kate Middleton's boobs and Mitt Romney acting like one (sorry, but), this week's been full of alarming headlines. Simmer down and drown out the election year chatter with wine tastings, yard sales, DIY projects, and glitchy DJs -- you know, weekend stuff. Here's what we'll be up to over the next three days:
Friday
It's just barely the weekend, so hightail it to Venice, where their sense of leisure time is the real deal. Start with a weekend-only wine tasting at Elvino on Abbot Kinney. Then, sober up down the street at the Beyond Baroque Literary Arts Center with Lectures from the Beyond: Sylvia Plath. Because celebrating your own femininity sometimes means doing whatever you damn well please, forgo the salad (with dressing on the side, naturally) this evening and instead indulge at Chaya Venice's Garlic Fair, which is going full force for the rest of the month with allium-centric delicacies like fish with garlic salt and chicken with garlic mole.
If garlic, wine, conversation, and sea breezes aren't your thing (whatever), Friday's also opening night of Knott's Scary Farm down in Orange County. So, dress in your best impression of an autumnal leaf and head down south for seasonal adrenaline pumping -- and maybe some preserves while you're at it.
Saturday
If you happened to go the wholesome (yet frightening) jam-and-hayrides route the night before, get up early on Saturday and head to Santa Monica pre-breakfast for a citywide yard sale that's bound to be chock full of goods. While you're in the area, head to The Tasting Kitchen in Venice for a special "working ripe" brunch menu and coordinating cocktails. Or, if "ripe" isn't worth a few extra bucks per person on your Saturday morning brunch bill, opt instead for endless mimosas at SaMo's Misfit.
Later, go downtown for an afternoon of culinary DIY. First, learn how to put up those pesky abundant-now-but-lacking-later tomatoes. The price of the class might make you wish you'd had an Italian grandma to teach you canning skills years ago, but just think of all the money you'll save by not buying Progresso every week. If you're not maxed out on food classes (or you did, in fact, grow up with the aforementioned grandma), try an udon noodle-making class at Foodstory. There's also dinner involved so not only will you have some culinary self-sufficiency under your belt, but some instant-gratification sustenance as well.
If Udon's not your jam, join Got a Girl Crush instead for some mingling at Echo Park's Myrtle boutique from 6-9 p.m. Then, head into Hollywood to celebrate 10 years of L.A.'s favorite turntable nerds, Dublab. Besides bahn-mi sammys and custom t-shirts, you better expect a raging dance party 'til close. And while you're in the area, pop into the new Southern-themed booze joint Sassafras at some point to "Build-a-Buck," a.k.a. customize your very own moscow mule.
Sunday
Maybe you didn't overspend last night and you totally deserve Lobster Hash. Or maybe you're in more of a New York Egg Sandwich kind of situation. Either way, stop by Bottega Louie for brunch (skip the insanely long line for the dining room by grabbing a bar table... and try to keep the snickering to yourself). Then, use whatever carb and protein dish you chose to your advantage while enjoying football-season-only bar specials over at Rock & Reilly's in West Hollywood. There will be bottomless Bloody Marys present, so plan accordingly.
At this point, you may or may not be completely tapped out. Or maybe you and an anonymous football fan have hit it off, who knows? But, if you're still hungry for more scene, there will be plenty at the Hollywood Bowl tonight as Animal Collective and Flying Lotus take over. If we were you (and we pretty much are, right?), we'd stop off at Tamarind Deli for dinner to go and then head to the Bowl.
As the day cools off and the glitchy musical stylings float through the air, don't forget to take it all in and enjoy your Sunday night -- it's one of the last ones of summer.