12/13/2013 01:42 pm ET Updated Feb 12, 2014

My Celebrity Pregnancy Friends Are Bringing Me Down

I'm a little annoyed with my celebrity pregnancy friends. Drew Barrymore, Megan Fox and Kristin Cavallari were all knocked up at the same time I was and are now onto their second children without even discussing it with me first. Here I am, debating whether I want to go through it again despite now knowing all the difficulties that come with pregnancy, birth and all the rest (compounded with the fact that I'd have a young child to contend with this time around) and none of them bothered to check in with me before just forging ahead and making a big life decision like that on their own. What made them decide to do it? How did they convince their husbands? Do they know something I don't know? I feel left out of the loop. Rude.

I love Drew Barrymore The Mom. She seems really into the role and that's cute and I'm a fan. She also seemed, of my famous pregnancy friends, the one who was most honest about the difficulties of motherhood and dealing with your postpartum body and such. So, I want to know how she knew she was ready to go for it. I think we could have had a really nice brunch at my place with some great pastries from the good bakery and I'd hear all about it.

Remember when Megan Fox was that celebrity you just couldn't escape for a while, who and was so in-your-face-sexy and said provocative things that got us all riled up and whatnot? That felt like forever ago. Maybe she's knocking out that second kid fast so she can start trending on Twitter again, or maybe she just wanted kids close together in age or maybe her husband just can't stop having sex with her (which would be understandable). Megan and I aren't as close as Drew and I are (in my head), so I'm not that mad at her for going ahead and getting pregnant without consulting me, but still I would like to know how she made the decision. An email would have been nice, even a text.

On to Kristin Cavallari. Kristin is the one I'm most annoyed with. She lives in Chicago at least part of the year, and so had no reason not to say "Hey, CZ, I think we're going to go through with this again. Eek!" What I most want to know is how hard it was to have the baby, lose the weight, fit into a wedding dress, and then get pregnant again. Or maybe it wasn't that hard or that big a deal for her, in which case I didn't want to talk with her about it? Maybe pregnancy cravings are extra-awesome after you just knocked yourself out to fit into a gown. I don't know. There is still time, Kristin. We can get together and talk about the best places in Chicago to take babies where the people won't care if they make noise and drop Cheerios on the ground.

Anyway, we'll see. In the meantime, Reese Witherspoon, Snooki, I wouldn't mind a heads-up if you're thinking about it again just because I need a sounding board. Jessica Simpson, you can just go ahead without me -- I'll just assume you're nine months pregnant again already.

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